A Chef's Hands
by dandy wonderous
Summary: An attack on Sanji's life leaves him without the use of his hands. How can he be a chef without them? Rated T for violence and language. COMPLETE! With extra SaNa goodness in the epilogue!
1. Chapter 1

I really need to stop posting in the middle of the night, but I was so busy all day (shopping for spring school clothes, then starting my parental imposed regimen of DDR everyday to lose five pounds by prom) that I didn't get to work on this until ten thirty. And then it took me three hours to write! But I think it turned out well, so it was worth it.

The fight scene, however, sucks. I'm no good at them! Hopefully I'll be better by the end of the story.

I plan to update this on Fridays, and this will have between six and eight chapters (I'm not sure which yet).

I don't own One Piece or (sadly) Sanji. But a girl can dream…

12/18/09: Minor grammar edits.

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A Chef's Hands

By Dandy Wonderous

Chapter 1

_Let's see here… Carrots, tomatoes, cabbage… Running low on flour… Peppers, maybe some mushrooms…_

Sanji added a few more things to his shopping list, then ran back over it again to make sure he wasn't forgetting anything. Triple checking his supplies (knowing it would be seen as his fault if they ran out of food during the next stretch of ocean), he added a thing or two more and then, satisfied, walked out onto the _Going Merry's _deck. Shielding his eyes from the sun, he watched the approaching island.

"Oh Sanji-kun!"

Sanji whirled around at Nami's call, full flirt mode going. "Yes, Nami-san? Whatever it is you need, I'm will-"

Nami cut him off. "Have you made the shopping list?"

"Oh, aye, Nami-san. Perhaps there is something special you'd like me to add, some dish you would-"

"I need you to pick up some map paper for me," she cut in again. "And the good kind, too; don't be stingy!"

"Yes, Nami-san! Anything for-"

"Here's the supply money." She dropped a small cloth bag in his hand. "I expect the change back."

"Yes, Nami-swan!" He watched the navigator's back as she disappeared back below, whispering "mellorine" to himself, before turning back to the deck, all trace of flirtiness gone. "Oi, Chopper, Usopp!" he yelled.

Two noses, one long and one blue, turned to look up at him. "Huh?"

"You two are helping with the shopping." He wandered back into the galley to wait for the ship to dock, ignoring the groaning protests launched at his back.

* * *

The supply shopping took a good deal of the day, more due to the shoppers' short attention span than the actual list.

"Usopp, you shithead," complained Sanji as he pulled Usopp out of the seventh trinket shop he had slipped into that day. "If you keep this up, we'll never get the shopping done." The cook looked around, then sighed. "Where the hell is Chopper?"

They found the reindeer entranced by some spinning window decorations. Both sniper and doctor then got a good scolding by Sanji about not getting sidetracked, about how they had an important job to accomplish and they couldn't forget about it over… Oo, who were those hot girls who just walked by?

Two pairs of hands restrained Sanji before he could follow the girls like a panting dog. "Oi, oi, what was all that about not getting sidetracked?" Usopp complained.

Against all odds, however, the shopping did get done, and, with the sun beginning to slip beyond the horizon, the three shoppers headed back to the ship with their goods.

_I feel like I'm forgetting something,_ Sanji thought to himself, going back over his list and ignoring Usopp's complaints about how the cook wasn't taking his share of the load, or any at all for that matter. He turned back to look at the laborers. _Flour… carrots… salt…_

Then he stopped dead his tracks. "Aw, shit!" he said aloud, turning on his heel. "I forgot about Nami-san's paper!"

"Nami's what?" Chopper asked.

"Who cares?" Usopp added. "How about helping us carry-"

"Take that on to the ship!" Sanji ordered, running past them. "I gotta go back!"

Usopp and Chopper watched him disappear in a cloud of dust. Then Usopp turned to look at Chopper hopefully. "So, what are the chances of you carrying me _and_ the supplies back to the _Going Merry_?"

_

* * *

_

Shit, shit, shit!!! Nami-swan's gonna kill me if I don't get her paper!

Every store Sanji had tried had been closed, and the few he had found that were still open didn't carry map paper.

_This is just my luck. Nami-san'll never forgive me…_

He was barely paying attention to where he was going, turning down random side streets and alleys in his effort to find a still open store. Finally, at the end of one such dark alley, he found a store with someone still inside, one that he was sure would have the paper he needed.

He wrenched open the door and nearly fell inside, panting heavily. "P-paper," he rasped out, sure he had left a lung back with Usopp in his haste.

The shopkeeper, who appeared to be getting ready to lock up, glared at him. "We're closed."

_Shit._ "Come on, I have money."

"I don't care; we close at seven, and it's…" He looked back at the clock on the wall, then scowled. "Six fifty-eight."

Sanji stared back at him for a moment, then straightened and smiled, pulling the coin purse out of his pocket. _Looks like my luck hasn't completely run out._ He walked over and emptied it onto the counter. "I'll take all the map paper this will buy." Then, he reached back in his pocket and pulled out a few more coins, his own money from his sparse savings. "And whatever cigarettes this will buy."

The man eyed him warily while he made the transaction, while Sanji idly adjusted his tie, unaware of the danger lurking just outside the door.

* * *

"So that's him, huh?"

"He fits the description; tall, lanky, hair covering one eye."

"East Blue's top chef, eh? He certainly doesn't look like much."

"He looks like a punk."

"Images can be deceiving, gentleman." The third man flipped a top hat he had been holding up onto his head, covering his messy black hair. "Don't forget, he is a member of the Straw Hat pirates."

"I don't care if he's Gold Roger's reincarnation," spat the first man, loading his gun. "He'll be no trouble at all."

The second man laughed cruelly. "Remember the deal; I won the poker game, I get to give the final blow." He pulled out a long dagger, twirled it expertly, then demonically licked the edge. "How much better this will taste after it's been marinated in his blood."

* * *

"Thank you, sir," said Sanji cheerfully, hefting the package of paper and his small bag of cigarettes. "Sorry for keeping you open." Leaving the shopkeeper muttering something about bratty, good-for-nothing punks, he exited the shop and started down the street, whistling a tune. He cut through an alley, stopping for a moment to put one of the new cigarette packs into his pocket and remove a smoke. He lit it and continued, still humming the tune to himself.

He was in the darkest shadows of the alley when three shapes stepped out from behind some crates and barrels, blocking his path. One man was huge, at least a meter taller than Sanji (he wondered how he had successfully hidden away the way he had), broad shouldered, and was holding a large gun in his hands. The second was about a head shorter than Sanji, lanky, holding a glinting dagger. The third, the one in the middle, was about Sanji's height, nicely dressed in a black suit with a matching top hat. He held no weapons, but Sanji sensed that he was the leader.

The cook stopped walking and ceased humming. Slowly, he took a drag of his cigarette, then took his time exhaling the smoke. "Well?"

"Well?" mocked the shortest one with the dagger.

Sanji ignored him. "Are you going to move? I need to get through here."

"My apologies," said the man in the middle. "I am afraid we must detain you."

Sanji took another drag. "Why's that?"

"We're under orders from our captain," said the big man.

"Ah, I see. And they would be…?"

"To make sure you never cook again," said the shorter man, smiling maliciously.

It wasn't exactly what Sanji had been expecting. "Who said I was a cook?"

"Are you not Sanji, cook to the Straw Hat pirates, formerly of the Baratie?" asked Top Hat.

Sanji studied them for a moment. "I am."

"Prior to entering the Grand Line, you entered a cooking contest in East Blue, correct?" Top Hat continued.

Sanji wracked his brain; too much had happened since entering the Grand Line for him to remember that far… Oh, right; against Carmen. When he had won that fabulous elephant tuna, and then that shithead Luffy had eaten the whole thing before Nami got a taste. The whole episode came back to him clearly. "Oh, yeah, that."

"And you won?"

"Yeah."

"So you would consider yourself one of the best chefs in the world?"

"I haven't met all the chefs in the world," Sanji conceded. "Though I would say I'm better than all the ones I _have _met. But stuff like that isn't important to me."

"I see," said Top Hat with a nod. "Well, regardless of whether you care about it or not, your reputation is still in danger of eclipsing our captain's."

Sanji could sense that things were about to turn ugly. "And your captain is…?"

"Nice try," the shorter man mocked, and, as though that was the cue, the big man took aim and fired at Sanji.

The acrobatic cook did a summersault to get out of the way, landing crouched on his feet. He quickly dived behind a crate to avoid a second barrage of bullets. _Damn… now what?_

Setting the paper down carefully on the ground, Sanji peeked back around, then ducked more lead. _Maybe this isn't too bad; there's only three of them, after all._

SHING!

Sanji jerked back as a dagger narrowly missed his head, embedding in the crate's wooden side. He looked up quickly to see one of his attackers perched on top. With a yank he dislodged the dagger and came after the cook. Sanji rolled away from him and, using his hands to propel himself, flipped into a kick that landed square in the man's face. He was sent smashing through the crate's sides.

"Danni!" yelled the large man, and he sent another round of bullets at Sanji. He regained his balance from the previous kick and took cover on the other side of the alley.

PHWIP PHWIP PHWIP!!!

Something bulky and razor edged came boomeranging from around the barrel's edge, aimed right at him. Sanji tried to jump out of the way, but in his efforts left his right leg exposed. He strangled a yelp of pain as one of the bullets buried into the skin just an inch or so below his knee.

_I'm getting nowhere. Gotta take the offensive._

Sanji launched himself over the barrel and found the man with the top hat, landing a kick squarely in his chest. A jarring pain shot through his left leg at the contact, and he fell back.

"Surprised?" asked the man.

"Is your frickkin' suit made of metal?" Sanji asked, getting to his feet and squaring his shoulders.

"I've eaten the Cotton Cotton no Mi," the man explained. "I can manipulate clothing at will, making them hard as steel," he held up the top hat, "or sharp as knives."

_So _that's_ what he threw at me._ "Sounds pretty dumb," Sanji jibed. He ducked down and aimed at kick at the man's unprotected head.

As Sanji's foot connected with the man's face, a bullet connected with his back. He gasped as the pain coursed through him like fire.

SHING!

Before Sanji could recover from the shot, the dagger was being buried into his shoulder. He winced and swung his foot around, connecting with the smaller man's waist. The dagger was ripped painfully from his skin as the man went down again.

BAM! Top Hat's rock hard glove slammed into Sanji's face, knocking Sanji off balance. BANG! A third bullet grazed his arm as he flailed through the air.

With one last frantic kick, Sanji connected with Top Hat's legs, but his pants were as solid as his shirt had been, and the cook only succeeded in jarring his leg again.

_Shit, shit, SHIT!!!_

Sanji pulled himself into a handstand and spun his legs, connecting with the big man and causing him to drop his gun to hold the tender area his assailant had managed to hit.

PHWIP! The Devil Fruit man had thrown his top hat again, and now it was circling back around to Sanji. He tried to dodged, but misjudged, and the blade tore into the muscle on his left leg.

Sanji finally fell to the ground, coughing up blood, his leg searing like hell. He hacked and gasped for air. After a second, he felt a hand grab his left arm. He tried to pull away, but the big man was stronger at the moment and easily held him still.

Top Hat held up his foot, grinning mercilessly. "I am sorry, but our orders were to be sure you never cook again." And with that, he brought his foot down hard on Sanji's left hand, eliciting a sickening crunch that echoed in the small alley.

_My… hand? No, oh God, please… not that…_

Sanji gasped in pain, then fell to hacking up more blood. _Why can't I feel it? It's so numb…_

"Hey, wait," said the shorter man as Top Hat raised his boot again. "I get the last blow at the bastard, remember?"

"Apologies," said the Fruit user, backing off. "I had forgotten."

"Whatever," the man spat. "Hold him still, Micki."

The big man, Micki, put his knee down heavily on Sanji's back. The cook bucked weakly in protest but got nowhere while Micki pulled his right arm out from his side.

The dagger man knelt down by Sanji's visible eye. "Don't worry; this will only hurt a lot." Then, cackling loudly, he plunged the knife through Sanji's hand.

* * *

"Okay, the carrots go over… there!"

"Okay!"

"And the flour can go… there!"

"Right!"

"And the cabbage can go… overboard!"

"Okay!"

"What are you two doing?" Nami asked, poking her head into the galley.

Chopper stopped in front of the door, holding the cabbage guiltily in his arms. "We were just putting the supplies away," he explained meekly.

Nami looked around the kitchen; things were haphazardly laid out on counters and in chairs. She raised an eyebrow. "I see."

"What's with that sarcastic tone?" Usopp demanded. "I think I did a wonderful job of organization!"

Nami took the box of cabbages from Chopper and carried them to the counter. "Why don't you wait for Sanji-kun to do this. Where is he, anyway?"

"Dunno," said Usopp with a shrug. "He said he had to get some paper for you or something and ran off."

"My map paper!" she cried in understanding. "He better have gotten some."

"Sanji! Meat!" An impatient voice interrupted, and Luffy came flying into the galley. He looked around at the mess, slowly turning from Usopp to Chopper to Nami. Then he frowned. "You're not Sanji."

"Obviously," said Nami, rolling her eyes. "He's not back yet."

"But I'm HUNGRY!" Luffy whined.

"What's new?" Nami sighed.

"New? I'm usually hungry," said Luffy, confused.

Nami ignored her captain's cluelessness. "You're just going to have to wait until Sanji returns," she told him, exiting the galley.

"But I'm hungry NOW!" he called after her.

"Eat the cabbage," Usopp offered.

"It's not meat."

"Eat the cabbage."

"No."

"Eat the cabbage."

"No."

* * *

Nearly two hours later, and there was still no sign of the blonde cook. The sun was completely gone now, but Luffy's complaints weren't. He sat by the galley door with Usopp and Chopper, all three complaining loudly about hunger.

Nami was leaning against the railing, salty sea breeze playing with her hair. Her eyes scanned the port town for any sign of the approaching chef.

"I'm worried," she said aloud.

Robin, who was sitting a few feet away in her deck chair reading a book by candlelight, flipped a page. "I was wondering when you'd admit it."

"He's usually on time; something must have happened."

"Relax, Nami," said Zoro, coming up behind her. He joined her at the rail, turning around and leaning his back against it. "That ero-cook probably found some dancing girls to drool over, that's all."

Nami shook her head. "He always comes back, though…"

Zoro examined her for a moment, her eyes fruitlessly scanning the harbor. Finally he snorted quietly. "Didn't know you cared about that dartboard so much."

She narrowed her eyes at a movement, but it proved to be nothing more than a stray cat, looking for mice by the ships. "He has some of my money. I want my change."

"Oh, so _that's_ what it is," said Zoro.

"Of course. I know Sanji-kun can handle himself in fight… right?" Her voice sounded the tiniest hint unsure.

Zoro folded his arms. "Don't tell him this 'cause he'll get a big head, but yeah, he can."

Nami half-smiled. "Wow. Didn't know you'd admit it."

Zoro scowled. "Admit what? I don't know what you're talking about."

BOING! Luffy had bungeed himself over to the rail beside Nami and was now crouched on it, looking out at the town. "Yosh! I've decided I'm tired of waiting on Sanji! I want meat now!" He stood up. "Nami! We're looking for him!"

Nami stood up straight and nodded. "Right. I can't get back to work until I have my map paper."

"You two have fun with that," said Zoro, starting to walk away. A stretchy hand grabbed the back of his collar and yanked him back against his will. "Ack! Luffy, the hell!?!"

"Zoro! You're helping."

"Tch. Why me?"

"Because."

Zoro sighed and rolled his eyes. "Aye, aye, captain…"

* * *

"Hello? Anyone there?"

Nami peered into the windows of the fifth store she had come to. Like all the others, it was closed for the night.

_All the shops are closed… Where could he have gone?_

She, Zoro, and Luffy had split up to cover more ground. She had been systematically checking each street and side alley in the commercial district, looking for any sign of the lovesick cook. So far the streets had been deserted, and completely Sanji-less.

She wandered in this way for another half hour, meeting no one. _It's eerily quiet… so weird! It's giving me the creeps…_

Looking down one alley she spied a familiar man walking on the street on the other side. She could recognize that walk anywhere.

The three katana sheaths at his hip helped, too.

"Zoro!" Nami called, running down the alley to catch up. "Any sign of him?"

Zoro waited for her to draw level with him, then continued down the street. "No. Are you yelling loud enough?"

"Huh?" she panted.

"Usually the ero-cook comes running at the sound of your voice." He sounded annoyed, but maybe, really, really deep down there was a minuscule hint of worry…

Nami followed the swordsman, peering into the shadows of every side street and alley. "All the shops were closed, so I don't know where he could-AAH!!!"

She shrieked, looking down at her ankle in fright. Zoro was at her side in an instant, ready to draw his swords.

A bloody, broken hand had emerged from the shadows of a particularly dark and sinister alley and grabbed onto Nami's ankle. It gave little resistance when she tried to pull away.

"N-nami-san?" whispered a weak voice from the shadow's depths.

"Oh my… Sanji-kun?" she asked tentatively, peering down at the hand's owner_._

"The hell?" asked Zoro aloud, looking at him as well.

Sanji was laying on his stomach and looked as though he'd been trying to pull himself back to the ship. His black suit was torn and bloody, and a trail of dried blood extended from the corner of his mouth to his chin. His right eye looked up at them through a half-closed lid, glazed over. "And… marimo-head," he moaned.

Nami crouched down next to him and looked him over. "Oh, Zoro!" she cried after a moment. "Look at his hands!"

Zoro _was _looking, and he wasn't enjoying it. One hand was mangled and broken, like it had been crushed under something. The right hand had a gaping tear in it, a blade wound, and while he didn't know the full extent of the damage, he had a good guess that the hand was probably now useless.

"Who would do this?" whispered Nami in horror.

"It was deliberate," said Zoro bitterly. "Whoever did this wasn't interested in a bounty; it was a personal attack, and a hateful one at that."

"S'okay," Sanji slurred. "Had worse."

Nami looked up at Zoro helplessly. Sanji didn't know the damage yet, hadn't grasped what had happened… or was trying not to, like denying the truth would make it go away.

"Roll him onto his back," Zoro ordered, crouching down next to the cook. Nami did as she was told, gently flipping Sanji over. He moaned slightly.

"Am I hurting you?" she asked.

"Oh, you could… never hurt me, Nami-swan," Sanji lied. Then he felt an arm force its way under his back, followed by another that slid under his knees. "Oi, shitty swordsman! What the hell-"

"Shut up, idiot," Zoro interrupted, lifting Sanji easily. "I'm taking you back to the ship."

"I can walk," he protested, unconvincing but vehement.

"Yeah, I saw what a great job you were doing before," Zoro snapped. "Crawling along like an ant."

"I can walk," Sanji repeated.

Zoro sighed and lowered Sanji to his feet. The weak cook took one step and collapsed. Zoro scooped him up again.

"Sorry, but I don't want to spend all night just walking back."

"Shitty… marimo," Sanji muttered, but all his energy was gone. He relaxed into Zoro's arms, too exhausted to fight back.

"I'll go get Luffy," Nami said, starting to run off. Zoro stopped her with a yell, and she turned back.

"Wait until we get to the ship; I'll send Usopp or someone."

Nami looked confused. "Why?"

"Because I want Chopper to determine the extent of the damage BEFORE Luffy sees him."

"…Why?"

"Because when Luffy sees this, he's gonna want to find the bastards that did it and kick their asses. But until we know who it was, we don't want him on a rampage."

"Oh," said Nami with a nod. She hurried back to Zoro, and they began walking. "Sanji-kun, do you remember who did this?"

"Pirates," he muttered, his eye fighting to stay open. "Three. One had a Devil's Fruit ability."

"Their captain?" Zoro prompted.

"Dunno," he slurred. "Wouldn't say… Said they were ordered to make sure I never cooked again…" He laughed, though it was really more of a croak. "What could make them think I would ever stop?" Then he lost the battle with his eyelid and passed out in Zoro's arms.

Nami looked from Sanji's hands to Zoro, who shook his head and sped up.

* * *

"Chopper! Oi, Chopper!"

The reindeer ran out on deck. "Zoro! Did you find… Oh…" His eyes widened when he saw Sanji's inert form.

"Where do you want him?" Zoro asked urgently.

"Um…"

"Take him to my room," said Nami suddenly, and everyone looked at her in shock. "He'll be more comfortable there, right?"

"Well, yes, but," began Chopper, but he was cut off when Sanji woke up unexpectedly.

"Nami-san," he croaked. "You don't have to…"

"Well, I am. I'll just… charge rent," she said flatly.

He smiled weakly. "Don't worry; my hammock'll be fine. After all, it's just some stab wounds, and a bullet wound or two..." Suddenly a dark cloud passed over his face. "And… how bad are my hands?"

The three tensed and looked at each other, unsure what to do.

"Show me," he demanded.

Chopper hesitated, then nodded at Nami. She grabbed Sanji's wrists and began pulling his hands in front of his face.

Sanji let out a strangled yell of anguish at the sight of his hands, his beautiful, skillful hands, now a mangled mess of blood and gore.

"Now, Sanji-kun," Nami began desperately. "I know it looks bad, but I'm sure Chopper can-"

"Shut up!" Sanji roared at her, and she flinched back. Sanji never raised his voice to her, never. Tears welled in both their eyes, though the cook was oblivious to hers. "Just… shut… up…"

And then he passed out again in Zoro's arms.

Nami stared at him, shaky. The tears welled dangerously then subsided as she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Cook-san didn't mean it, Navigator-san," Robin said confidently. "Surely you can understand how he must feel right now."

Nami nodded, calming back down. "I know. Zoro, take him to my room. Then get Usopp to go find Luffy."

Zoro, for once, didn't complain about being ordered around by "that woman." "Okay. But he's not going to be happy about this…"

**Chapter 1 End**

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A/N: I'm doing my author's notes a little differently this time because it's late, and this story is thirteen pages long and I don't want to reread all that. Sorry if there are typos! (I try to reread each section as I go, but that doesn't guarantee there aren't any.)

Having Nami interrupt Sanji all the time was fun. All the parts with Usopp and Chopper were fun, too.

Attack of the sucky generic villain names! Seriously, Danni and Micki? I can't think of names! Sorry… The guy with the top hat (seriously, Cotton Cotton no Mi? I'm so lame!) still needs a name; wish me luck on thinking up a good one by his next appearance in the next to last chapter! Their captain also needs a name, a better one than the lame pun name I thought up this morning in the shower…

I have a serious problem with making up names for things, by the way. Plots, characters, species, lands… those I have no problem with. But names; nope, no capacity for creative naming at all!

It sucks beating Sanji up… Waah! I'm sorry, Sanji, forgive me!

Zoro's being nice! Good Zoro; have a cookie.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this first chapter! See you soon!

This is DDR Master (on light mode T_T) Dandy, signing off!


	2. Chapter 2

Sorry I didn't get this out earlier today, but prom's tomorrow and I'm getting ready (my dress is FABULOUS!).

Starting next week I have "Little Shop of Horrors" rehearsal (I'm in the chorus and helping with props (I'm not actually in drama, I just help because I like acting and because my boyfriend's in production class)) everyday until 9:00 (except on Wednesday, which is until 6:00), so I'll have to update this for the next two weeks on Saturday. The week after that I think I'm gonna update twice, and then the week after that the last chapter will go up. Sorry for the slow update schedule; once the play's over it'll all get better!

**Reader Review Corner!**

Dancing Nightmare: Eeeyah, thank you for your review! I'd read both "Hot Chocolate" and "Flowers For You and Me" before I had my account and loved them, so I was really excited to see that! Thank you!

ShoalinQueen: Then I hope you like this chapter, despite the slight SaNa tinge. And I'm sure you'll like the next chapter for the Sanji/Zoro stuff to come. There's a little here too, because I also like their nakamaship. And SanRob is actually my favored Sanji pairing, but Nami fit this story better…

This chapter is a LOT shorter than the last. It's basically the angst chapter that invariably comes in a story of this sort. Hope you enjoy!

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A Chef's Hands

By Dandy Wonderous

Chapter 2

"I hope that's all the bullets," said Chopper as the second fell with a plink into the metal tray. He cleansed the wound while Zoro watched from where he leaned against the cabin wall. Only he remained with the doctor now; Robin and Nami had made a hasty retreat once it became clear that Sanji's pants would have to be removed to get to the wounds on his legs. Much to his chagrin, the swordsman had had to help with the undressing as the stupid cook refused to regain consciousness.

"How bad is his leg?" Zoro asked, nodding to the freshly wrapped gash. He did his best to sound like he had only a passing interest.

"He'll need to stay off it for awhile," said Chopper, knowing that such instructions would go, as usual, unheeded. "But it'll be fine once it heals."

"And his… shoulder?"

"The knife missed his bones. It'll be sore for awhile, but the damage is minimal."

There was nothing else to ask about, so Zoro hesitantly voiced the most important question. "His hands?"

Chopper's face clouded. He indicated the left hand first, which was bound and splinted to keep the crushed bones in place. "Maybe if the bones can set properly… But there were so many tiny fragments." He moved on to the right hand. "And this one… The wound will heal, but the damage done to the muscle and nerves may be irreparable."

"So…?"

Chopper ran a hand over his teary eyes. "He may never use them again."

A slight groan.

"Did you catch all that, ero-cook?" _Of course he wakes up _now.

"Enough," Sanji moaned. He was laying on his back, tilting his head slightly to glare with one eye at the swordsman. "Why exactly are you here?" His gaze floated to his body. "And why the hell am I in my boxers?"

"Idiot. It's not like it was my idea!"

"SAAAN-JIII!!!"

Zoro looked up at the yell. "Guess who's back."

The rubberman jumped through the hatch to the girls' room, landing with a slight bounce on the floor. He took one look at his chef, who raised his curly eyebrow, then turned around again. "Zoro! Let's go!"

"Go _where_?" asked both Zoro and Sanji together.

"To kick those guys' asses!"

"Idiot," said Zoro, restraining Luffy by grabbing his shoulder. "There's no point. We don't know who they are, and they're probably long gone by now." _Not like I would mind getting a crack at them myself…_ He and Sanji might not have seen eye to eye, but to mess with one of his nakama's dreams was to mess with Zoro.

"Sanji!" yelled Luffy again. "Who did this?" Rage burned in his eyes as he looked at the cook.

"No, Luffy," said Sanji slowly. He used his elbows to push himself into a sitting position, wincing slightly from the pressure on his injured shoulder. "It's like marimo says; they're no where near here anymore."

Luffy gritted his teeth. "Like I care! I'll find them, I'll-"

"I know," Sanji interrupted. "But…" He smiled broadly at his captain. "I want to help."

Luffy stared back at him. The rage slowly faded, and then a smile grew to match Sanji's. He laughed loudly. "Yosh! Then you'll just have to hurry up and get better!"

"Whatever you say, captain."

* * *

Gentle waves rocked the _Going Merry_, and Sanji, alone now in the girls' cabin, lay back in Nami's bed, listening to the ocean. It would be dawn soon, but Sanji couldn't find rest, and instead stared at the ceiling, his eyes absentmindedly tracing the grains of the woodwork. Chopper had given him medicine for the pain before he left, but a dull ache was steadily making itself known in the cook's shoulder and leg. He didn't mind so much, though; the pain meant that they would be okay. It was the dead numbness of his hands that worried him…

"_He may never use them again."_ Chopper's words echoed hauntingly in his mind. For the thousandth time, Sanji lifted his arms up so he could see the broken appendages. He gritted his teeth at the sight, then sighed and lowered them back to the mattress.

Losing his hands had always been a possibility, though one that he had avoided at all costs. His hands were his livelihood; without them, he was… well, useless. Oh sure, he could still kick things, but there couldn't be any powerful handstand kicks, and there was no telling how this would throw off his balance. But cooking… this was the reason for his existence, and now it was stolen, possibly forever.

He knew that, had it been in the defense of his nakama, he would gladly have sacrificed his hands, with no complaints. But…

"…_Your reputation is still in danger of eclipsing our captain's."_

"That's a shitty reason," he spat to himself, wanting desperately to kick the stuffing out of something (or _someone_). _If you want to surpass someone you work hard. What kind of chef… what kind of _person _gets what they want by simply sabotaging their competition?_

It would have helped a little if he could at least calm himself with a cigarette, but he couldn't even hold a smoke with his hands like this. This added frustration, on top of the virtual loss of his dream, his utter uselessness, his humiliation at getting carried by Zoro (oh yes, he still worried about that moment of patheticness), was just too much.

_And I yelled at Nami-san, _he remembered. The memory was hazy (as he had only been half-conscious), but he could still remember yelling at her… could remember that it upset her.

Light footsteps in the storage room above. The hatch opened and Nami made her way down into the room with the stealth and silence that only a thief can accomplish.

Still, it didn't make her invisible. "Nami-san?"

She jumped, startled. "Oh, Sanji-kun! I didn't know you were awake."

"Couldn't sleep," he said, once again using his elbows to push himself up. Thankfully, he had managed to get back into his slacks and blue shirt, with Chopper's help. "And to what do I owe the pleasure of your company?" he added, with all the flirty tone he could manage under the circumstances.

"I just came down to get some things for me and Robin," she explained.

Sanji blinked, then immediately started to get up. "My apologies, Nami-san. I forgot this was your room; I'll just go-"

"Moron," said Nami forcefully, pushing him back down on the bed with one hand. He was strong enough to resist, but found any such rebellion against a woman (especially one that was touching his chest) impossible. "I've already said you could stay here for awhile."

"But where are you and Robin-chan-"

"Your room, of course." She smiled impishly. "Zoro wasn't too happy about being kicked out; he threw quite a fit."

"That lout. I'll remember to kick him later for not immediately surrendering our room to you."

"Don't bother; I just increased his debt a little for my suffering," she said airily.

"Ah! Nami-san is so beautiful when she's being crafty!" Sanji watched Nami pull some clothes out of the chest of drawers, making a small pile of things she and Robin would need. He took a deep breath; there were things that needed to be said. "Nami-san?"

"Hmm?"

"I'm sorry."

She turned around, looking annoyed. "I already told you, don't worry about the room-"

"I lost your paper."

Nami stopped mid-sentence. She hadn't been expecting that. "Wh-what?"

Sanji was staring at the blanket that covered his legs, incredibly interested in a piece of fuzz. "When I was fighting those guys, I put your paper down where it would be safe. But I didn't go back for it. I'm sorry."

"Sanji-kun…"

"I'll pay you back as soon as I can," he continued, already calculating how much cigarette money it would take… Though as he got all his money from Nami anyway, it would really just add to the huge bill he, like the rest of the crew, had running.

Nami remained silent, unsure what to say. Any other time she would be all over him for losing the all-important map paper, but even she wasn't so heartless as to yell at him now.

He took a shaky breath. "And… I'm sorry for yelling at you. You didn't deserve it." He shook his head. "I was out of line, and I shouldn't have-"

He was abruptly cut off by Nami's arms, which wrapped around his shaking chest, careful to avoid the wound on his shoulder. "Don't be stupid," she admonished, keeping her voice as cheerful as she could. "I don't blame you for that."

"N-Nami-san?" He was surprised; he honestly hadn't expected her to hug him.

"I don't blame you," she repeated.

Sanji had made it this far. He had made it through the fight, and it's aftermath, and being carried, and learning about his hands, and not being able to make their supper (Usopp had stepped in), and not being able to smoke, without breaking down. But his strength to stay strong had left him, and, for a moment, Sanji let himself be weak.

"Th-thank you, N-nami-sw-swan…" he choked out around the tears that he could no longer hold back. She didn't pull away; her nakama needed her.

Things were silent in the cabin; Sanji's lament was not loud and wailing, but quiet, private, intimate. Nami kept her arms around him and leaned her head against his uninjured shoulder, sitting next to him on the bed. There she waited for him to cry himself out.

It didn't last long; not even ten minutes had passed before Sanji straightened up and used his shirt sleeve to dry the right side of his face. He took another shaky breath, then gave her a wide smile. "Mellorine," he said teasingly.

She pulled her arms back in mock disgust. "Ugh. I knew you were just seeing how long I'd hug you," she complained. But his eye said _thank you_, and hers answered, _you're welcome._

"NAAA-MIII!!!" called Luffy from up on deck. "Where'd you go?"

Nami jumped to her feet. "I better go before Luffy and Zoro decide to steer the ship themselves," she said, more of an actual concern than a joke. She grabbed the pile of clothes she had gathered, Sanji watching her.

"Are you sure you don't just want your room back, Nami-san?"

She turned and smiled at him again. "Of course. The longer you stay here, the more rent I get!"

* * *

The sizzle and pop of bacon frying filled the room, and the smell of grease and meat filled the first mate's nose. He readjusted his top hat, watching his captain cook breakfast and waiting for the reaction to his report.

The large man was slow in answering. He spared no glance to the other man, giving all his attention to the meal. "And you're _sure_ his hands are destroyed?"

"Of course, Captain."

He snorted, grabbing some kind of spice and sprinkling it over the meat. "I would rather you have chopped them off."

"Apologies, Captain." The man bowed, sweeping his top hat off and placing it against his chest. "We could hunt him down again, if you wish."

"Not right now. His captain is worth 100,000,000 beli, remember?"

"If he is anything like his cook, he should not be anything we cannot handle."

"I don't doubt your ability…" The captain tended the bacon awhile in silence. "We'll give it some time, then we'll see how he is. If he shows any signs of his hand healing…"

"Kill him?"

"Exactly."

**Chapter 2 End**

* * *

A/N: I always feel weird writing angsty cry stuff, like I'm intruding on something private (even though the people aren't even real!). It was longer in my head, but I later thought that that shorter section would fit the characters better.

_Much to his chagrin, the swordsman had had to help with the undressing as the stupid cook refused to regain consciousness._

Oh Zoro, how I torture thee! For you ZoSan fans (I am NOT one, by the way), that's for you: Zoro took off Sanji's pants. Okay, so it's not really for you. But if that's what floats your boat…

_The wound will heal, but the damage done to the muscle and nerves may be irreparable._

A few years ago my dad got run over by a boat trailer with the boat still on it. He's perfectly fine now, but at the time he had a few broken ribs, a fractured spine, a punctured lung, and a hurt hand. I'm not sure exactly HOW his hand was hurt, it just was. Long after everything else, even his spine, had healed, that hand's nerves were still damaged, and it wouldn't close or work properly. He finally had to give in and get surgery done on it, and even then they were afraid it couldn't be fixed. It was, however, and his hand works fine now. But that proves that I actually know a small amount about what I'm talking about. Having even one hand out of commission, by the way, really sucks. Try to pay attention to everything you use your hands for today; you're gonna seriously appreciate them more if you do. In fact, I'd rather lose a leg than a hand.

_Chopper ran a hand over his teary eyes. _

I'm guessing Chopper does a lot of his surgery type stuff (like removing those bullets) in his Heavy Point (that's the right one, right?) because it actually has hands.

"_And why the hell am I in my boxers?"_

Boxers or briefs, Sanji-kun?

"_To kick those guys' asses!"_

You know as well as I do that that's exactly what he'd want to do at this point.

I love Luffy. He's the best!

_He and Sanji might not have seen eye to eye, but to mess with one of his nakama's dreams was to mess with Zoro._

I love Zoro, too (even though I torture him). Aw, who am I kidding, I love ALL the Straw Hats! I just happen to love Sanji slightly more.

…_lay back in Nami's bed…_

According to the diagrams of the _Going Merry_, the girls' cabin doesn't have a bed. But Nami was laying in one when she was sick, so I'm saying there is one. There's a couch, so maybe it's a pull-out.

_He knew that, had it been in the defense of his nakama, he would gladly have sacrificed his hands, with no complaints. _

You know he would, just like Zoro would give up his arms or his legs. Or how any of them would give up whatever was important to them. The Straw Hats are cool like that; that's why _One Piece_ is pretty much my favorite story ever.

"_And to what do I owe the pleasure of your company?" he added, with all the flirty tone he could manage under the circumstances._

When I write Sanji in flirt-mode, I tend to think of Tamaki (from _Ouran High School Host Club_) as a model. They're a lot alike when they're flirting.

"_I just came down to get some things for me and Robin," she explained._

Robin and _I_. *is punched* Pointless Naruto Abridged reference! I love those guys.

"_Don't bother; I just increased his debt a little for my suffering," she said airily._

Seriously, at the rate Zoro's going, he'd have to turn in Whitebeard, Blackbeard, Ace, Shanks, all the Shichibukai, and Dragon to the marines just to pay off Nami's _interest_.

…_Usopp had stepped in…_

Usopp cooks in the Rainbow Mist filler arc while Sanji is being depressingly feckless (AP English word!) elsewhere, so now he gets to cook some more!

…_Sanji straightened up and used his shirt sleeve to dry the right side of his face. _

At least as far as the anime's concerned, Sanji cries out of both eyes. Watch episode seventy-whatever, where he and Luffy are freaking out because they think Nami's gonna die; see, two streams of tears!

"_Mellorine," he said teasingly._

I'm in the beginning of Skypiea now, and there's a part when they're going up the Milky Road when Nami falls back and Sanji catches her and is actually holding her. "Mellorine, mellorine!" Seriously, that guy has a one track, perverted mind. Before that, in the whirlpool before the knock-up stream appears, he yells, "Now, Nami-san, press yourself against my chest!" SERIOUSLY one track.

That last bit was not going to be in there at first, but I decided to add it as this chapter seemed depressingly short. It really doesn't mean much; just keeping the evil pirate threat alive.

Whew, those were a lot of author notes. Sorry you have to wait until Saturday for the next update! Really, truly. I'll try to make the next chapter worth the wait; it'll have a lot of (amusing) Sanji/Zoro nakamaship, a tiny bit more Sanji angst, and maybe a spot of happiness for the chef. Woo!

Ready to dance the night away at prom, this is Dandy Wonderous, signing off.


	3. Chapter 3

Guess wh-at!?! I get to update earlier than expected! Yay!!!

Bad news; I probably won't get to update until Sunday of next week instead of Saturday like I planned. I'm so sorry! It's because our choir got moved to a Saturday morning performance for state festival, so my whole day is gone for that and the night is gone for the play. I'm sorry again! I'll update as soon as I can on Sunday. Sorry, sorry, sorry…

Thanks to everybody who's been reading and reviewing both this and my one shots. You really make my day (and sometimes even my whole week). Those of you who are Sweetie fans thanks to her little blurb in "Chalk," there's a bit more for you at the end (she once again attacked the keyboard).

Disclaimer: I don't own _One Piece_; if I did, do you honestly think Sanji and Zoro would wear shirts?

**

* * *

**

A Chef's Hands

By Dandy Wonderous

Chapter 3

Three days without his hands and Sanji was already going crazy.

Not only could he not cook or smoke, he couldn't do _anything_. Couldn't read (couldn't get a grip on the book), couldn't fight with Zoro (Chopper threatened him with sedatives, and the swordsman seemed to be avoiding him lately, anyway), couldn't help on the ship (he sat around uselessly on the deck and watched everyone else be busy). All he could do, really, was lay in bed and stare at the ceiling. And sulk. He was doing _a lot_ of sulking.

Luffy, Usopp, and Chopper tried to help on this front. They hung out when they weren't needed on deck, being their normal rowdy selves while Sanji put on a good show of being annoyed by their presence. Luffy did his typical impressions of the other crew members, Chopper put chopsticks in his nose, and Usopp sang so many "Captain Usopp" songs he thought his ears would fall off. In truth, though, these visits could never last long enough; once the three partiers had to leave, his empty room fell into a dead, lonely, oppressive silence.

Of course, what he couldn't do wasn't limited to means of entertainment. It was like being a baby again; he couldn't take care of himself.

Sanji loathed every second of his miserable helplessness.

He couldn't feed himself, for one thing. Usually, Chopper or Nami helped him eat. It was incredibly humiliating, to sit there and be fed like a toddler. The first time this happened he had ended up hiding in his knees from Chopper while the doctor had rubbed his back soothingly. The first time Nami helped him he had cried again, though she secretly suspected it was more to lean against her chest than out of despair. She didn't say anything; might as well let him have _something_.

Twice, Robin had come down. Sanji liked this best; she read a book in the corner while two of her Hana Hana hands fed him. Robin, being her perceptive self, figured this out, and offered to come down more. Sanji had cooed that a woman should be up on deck having fun rather than being cooped up inside with him, but he was really grateful, and Robin mentioned the idea to Chopper anyway.

Perhaps the most embarrassing moment for the injured chef came late in first full day of his recovery. Nami had ventured into the storage room for something or other and found Sanji standing rather awkwardly in front of the bathroom door.

"Sanji-kun? Something wrong?" Nami asked, breaking him out of the little trance he was in.

"Oh, Nami-san!" he said in surprise, whirling around to face her, face a light pink. "I didn't hear you come down."

"Do you need help with something?" she asked cheerfully, wondering why he was in the storage room in the first place.

His face grew to a bright red. "Oh, I, er… N-no, not… not really, I…"

Nami stared back at him in confusion, and then realization dawned on her. "Oh, do you need me to open that door for you?" She indicated the bathroom door with her eyes.

The blush grew brighter still. "Er, yes, if you could, Nami-san…" He trailed off sheepishly.

_It's not _that _big a deal,_ thought Nami, still confused. _He has no reason to be that embarrassed…_

She sauntered past him and opened the door easily. "There you go," she said with a smile, then turned to go back to finding what she needed. Locating it, she straightened up… and found that Sanji was still standing, blushing, by the open bathroom door. "Uh, Sanji-kun… is something wrong?"

Sanji's face was so bright, Enel could see it from space. "I, uh…" Then, unexpectedly, he leaned back against the wall and rubbed his eyes with his forearm. "I can't do anything," he muttered, voice broken.

Nami's eyes traveled in befuddlement from his face to his shirt, to his trousers… which would have to be unbuttoned.

Mentally slapping herself for not catching on, Nami moved to the ladder. "Want me to go get Chopper?"

Sanji nodded. His face defied the color wheel and invented its own shade of red. Nami spared him further humiliation and hurried away.

Three days of being pathetic passed, and Sanji hated every long, everlasting second of it. Even now, he was sitting in the bed, sulking again, when Nami appeared on the stairs, holding a bowl of stew, or maybe ramen. That seemed to be all Usopp could make.

She smiled cheerfully. "Hi, Sanji-kun! I have your lunch!"

He gave her a weak smile. "Thank you, Nami-swan."

She sat the bowl gently in his blanket covered lap and spooned some out. Sanji eyed it, sniffed the aroma. "Beef stew?"

"Yep." She fanned it to cool it, then brought the spoon to his mouth. Sanji took the bite, then chewed the beef chunk slowly.

"Hmm…"

"What was that, Sanji-kun?" she asked, already scooping up more.

"Huh? Oh, nothing." He took the next bite, then made the thoughtful noise once more. "Hmm…"

Nami raised an eyebrow. "What? Don't like it? I thought it was fine."

"Oh, it's okay," he answered. He took the next bite, seeming to mull over the food. "It's just… Ah, never mind."

The navigator was growing impatient, letting the spoon rest in the bowl. "Really, Sanji-kun, what is it?

"It's just… he didn't marinate the meat properly. It lost too much flavor. And there are some spices he could have used that would have improved the taste of the broth." Sanji closed his eye, mentally going over what he would have done differently to turn the simple stew into a culinary masterpiece.

"Wait here," said Nami suddenly, and she ran over to her desk. Sanji watched her, puzzled.

"What's wrong, Nami-san?"

She pulled out a piece of paper and an ink pen, then returned to the bed. She smiled. "Tell me what you would do to improve it," she prompted, pen at the ready.

Sanji blinked at her dumbly a moment, then suddenly looked worried. "But Nami-san, your paper-"

"This isn't map paper; don't worry about it. Come on, tell me!"

"But it's Usopp's job now," he argued slowly, an edge to his voice.

"That idiot's nice for a temporary chef," Nami said condescendingly. "But he's nowhere near your level. And let's face it; we all miss your cooking."

Sanji was silent for a moment, then he beamed, old flirt mode returning. "Nami-swan! Your kindness knows no bounds!"

"Er, you're welcome. Now come on, spill."

Sanji became serious again. "Yes, Nami-san!" And then he began to dictate what he would do to make the stew, for the first time in three days feeling like he had a purpose again.

* * *

"He gave you this WHOLE LIST of instructions!?!" Usopp gasped, slightly offended.

"Yep," said Nami with a shrug. "Once he started talking about cooking, he couldn't stop. He got done with stew and went on to all kinds of different things; my hands are more tired than if I drew a hundred maps!" She leaned over the table and rifled through the papers until she found a certain sheet. "That reminds me, I could really use one of these right now." She pointed at Sanji's instructions for a rather elaborate mikan drink.

"Have fun making it, then."

"Oh, no, Usopp. It's your job now!"

"What? I'm not making that for you!"

Twenty minutes and one mikan drink later, the navigator sat sipping contentedly while Usopp washed dishes, nursing a large, Nami-inflicted bump on his head.

"Man, how does Sanji do it?" Usopp wondered out loud. "Making all the meals and then extra things for you girls, and then there's all these dishes… Isn't anyone gonna help me with this!?!"

"If no one helps ero-cook, what makes you think we'll help you?" Zoro pointed out from his seat at the table.

"Navigator-san," said Robin, ignoring Usopp's protests. "You said Cook-san was happy when he told you how to cook all those things?"

"Uh, yeah. Why?"

"I was just thinking, why not let Cook-san into the kitchen more often? He could direct our cooking. Would that not improve his mood?"

Nami sat up straighter in her chair. "You're right; it would."

"What do you think, Swordsman-san?"

Zoro scowled. "Like I care." He got up from the table and left the galley, saying, "Do whatever you want," in parting.

"He worries," Robin observed.

"Really?" Nami stared at the door. "Nope. I don't see it."

Robin laughed softly behind her hand. "He does; you just have to look hard." She turned back to Nami, serious again. "What about Cook-san?"

Nami smiled. "I think it's a great idea."

* * *

"Oi, ero-cook! Wake up, dumbass."

Sanji blearily opened his right eye to glare at Zoro for the rude awakening. "What the hell do you want?" he grumbled sleepily.

"The devil woman sent me after you," the swordsman said, equally as grumpy. "Said she wants you to come to the kitchen. Got me out of bed before the frickin' crack of dawn…"

"Nami-san is not a "devil woman," bastard!" Sanji yelled angrily. He pushed himself up on his elbows. "Did she say why?"

"No. Now come on, dartboard, let's go."

Sanji sat up all the way. "Go get Chopper," he ordered.

"Chopper's busy."

"Get him anyway."

"What do you want?" Zoro raised an eyebrow suspiciously.

Sanji glared at him a moment, then sighed and swung out of bed.

Now Zoro saw the problem. "Damn… Don't you usually wear your pants to bed?"

Sanji folded his arms and nodded at his boxers. "This cut down on some… problems."

Both men stayed awkwardly silent for a moment, neither looking forward to what was about to happen. Finally Zoro spoke again. "Where are th-"

"On the chair," Sanji answered quickly, nodding to Nami's desk chair.

Zoro sighed and retrieved the pants, glaring at them accusingly. "This is dumb," he informed his rival flatly.

"It's not like I wanted this to happen, marimo," the other snapped.

Zoro glanced down at the floor. "I know," he said simply. Sanji gaped at him a moment, but before he could fashion a reply Zoro stepped forward. "Let's get this over with."

Sanji cringed.

What followed was a series of curses, yelling, and threats.

"Shitty swordsman; don't yank so hard! My foot wasn't through yet!"

"Move faster, then, dartboard!"

"I'm try-aw, shit!"

THUNK!

"Ow! Idiot cook; why'd ya fall on me!?!"

"Because YOU knocked me down, shithead!"

"If you would just MOVE! … How're your hands?"

"Fine."

"Good. Now, let's try again… Bastard! You kicked me!"

"I didn't mean to! The ship lurched; not my fault I can't catch myself!"

"To hell you couldn't; that was on purpose!"

"No it wasn't! … Watch the zipper, marimo!"

In the end both Sanji, fully clothed, and Zoro sat on the bed, staring in opposite directions from each other.

"We never speak of this again," said Sanji flatly.

"Agreed." Zoro stared down at the floorboards for what felt like ages before speaking again. "Hey, cook…"

"What?"

"We're going to find those bastards, you know. And then we're gonna kick their asses."

Sanji stared up at the ceiling. "Wish I could help."

"Don't start that crap," Zoro said angrily, glaring at the other man. "You ARE going to help, damn it. I mean, your legs still work, don't they?"

"Well, yeah, but-"

"Then there's not a problem. So you can't do those frilly handstands anymore." He smiled at the vein that popped in Sanji's forehead; there was the fight he was looking for. "You can still _kick_ ass."

Sanji's eye traveled back to the ground and he laughed quickly. "Yeah… yeah, I guess so." Then he hopped to his feet. "Oi, oi! Nami-swan's waiting in the kitchen for me!" He ran to the stairs.

Zoro watched him take off and rolled his eyes. _Stupid cook…_ He got up and followed the man out on deck.

"Hey, ero-cook!"

Sanji stopped in his tracks and looked over his shoulder at the swordsman, who was about to go into the men's quarters. He was doing likewise, though his body was angled slightly more toward the other.

Zoro seemed to hesitate, then said, "You better get well soon. Things are boring around here without you to fight."

Sanji was surprised; he hadn't expected such sentiment from Zoro. Then he laughed once and started back toward the galley. "Don't worry, shitty marimo! Once my hands work again, I'll come kick _your _ass!"

Zoro rolled his eyes and entered the cabin. _He wishes,_ he thought, letting a small smile cross his face.

* * *

When Sanji entered the kitchen he was greeted by all of his nakama (minus Zoro), who were standing in a straight line in military attention. Even Robin was playing along, looking regal in her white cowboy hat. Luffy seemed to be having a hard time keeping still, but they otherwise looked very disciplined.

The cook was confounded. "Uh… What…?"

Usopp stepped forward out of the line and saluted. The others saluted in unison behind him. "Sanji-san, sir! Your valiant kitchen crew is awaiting your orders, sir!"

Sanji stared at them in confusion. "Huh?"

"Your kitchen crew, sir!" Usopp repeated, still in the ridiculous army tone. "I am the great Assistant Head Chef, Usopp-sama!"

"Ahem?" whispered Nami behind him.

"Er… Usopp-san, sir," he corrected, though it was directed more at Nami than the dumbstruck cook.

Luffy finally gave up on staying in rank. "We get to help you cook, Sanji!" he yelled in excitement, bouncing up and down.

Chopper followed his example, flying out of the line and attaching himself to Sanji's waist. "So you won't be sad anymore," he explained. "Don't be sad anymore, Sanji!"

"Wait… what exactly is going on?"

"You see, Sanji-kun," said Nami, giving up (to Usopp's complaint) on the military charade. "Robin had the idea to let you direct our cooking, like what you did with the notes you made yesterday. That way, you can still be in the kitchen even if you can't… well, you know…"

Sanji looked from her to Robin, who was smiling slightly. "Your idea… Robin-chwan! You're so sweet to think of me!" he cooed.

"You're welcome, Cook-san."

"Sanji!" cried Luffy, interrupting Sanji's fawning session. "Let's make some meat now! And better meat than what Usopp makes!"

"Jerk."

"Yeah!" agreed Chopper loudly, caught up in the excitement. "Let's-AAH! Don't be sad, Sanji!"

Sanji wiped away the happy tear that had slid down his cheek and laughed. _You guys…_ "Alright, let's get started on breakfast! Get me some eggs!"

"Yes sir!"

"Eggs aren't meat!"

"Fine! Then we'll get some bacon, too!"

"Yosh! Bacon!"

And thus the Straw Hats' cook returned home.

**End of Chapter 3**

* * *

A/N: I felt kind of awkward writing parts of this chapter. Not too weird or mushy, is it? It is? Darn…

_The first time Nami helped him he had cried again, though she secretly suspected it was more to lean against her chest than out of despair. _

He has a one-track mind; seriously! Right now I'm in Skypiea, and when the _Going Merry_ is being carried off by the speedy shrimp thingy, he's just like, "Oh no! Why is Nami-san wearing a t-shirt!" Cracks me up though. Oh, and, "We have to save Nami-san and Robin-chan!" And Luffy adding, "What about Zoro and Chopper?" every time… Heeheehee…

_Nami had ventured into the storage room for something or other and found Sanji standing rather awkwardly in front of the bathroom door. _

I looked over all the floor plans of the _Going Merry_, but my apologies if I get any of the layout wrong. I do know where the bathroom is, though! Woo!

By the way, this whole bathroom idea actually came when I was reading another fic on this site ("Losing His Touch" by White N Nerdy in the _National Treasure_ section; if you're a Riley fan you should read it!), when Riley's hands are injured and he tells Ben that he might need some help in the bathroom. I remembered that when I began working on this, so here's the bathroom scene, One Piece-a-fied. And less of a joke than it is in White N Nerdy's fic.

_Nami's eyes traveled in befuddlement from his face to his shirt, to his trousers… which would have to be unbuttoned._

I didn't intend for this to become a fic about Sanji's pants, though it seems that way. Actually, the following scene with Zoro was just something I later thought of on a whim. It's funny though. Or I think it is… Maybe my sense of humor is just twisted? Anyway, this isn't a fic about Sanji's pants! That's my point, yeah.

_That seemed to be all Usopp could make._

I don't know what all Usopp can cook, actually, but it's probably easy things that a kid growing up without parents can make. Part of the problem is that I know absolutely nothing about cooking.

…_his blanket covered lap…_

Blanket covered because of the boxer thing, which all relates back to the bathroom thing. But again, this isn't a fic about Sanji's pants… or his underwear…

_She pointed at Sanji's instructions for a rather elaborate mikan drink._

Non-alcoholic, I'm sure, since she's a minor. *shifty eyes* Yeah, I know, she has an insanely high alcohol tolerance; lucky her.

"_Making all the meals and then extra things for you girls, and then there's all these dishes… Isn't anyone gonna help me with this!?!"_

"_If no one helps ero-cook, what makes you think we'll help you?" Zoro pointed out from his seat at the table._

Okay, it's been three chapters and two one shots and I haven't done it yet, so here it is: the "Why does no one help Sanji with anything on the ship" rant! Dun dun dun!!!

First of all, there's the dishes. Whenever Sanji isn't cooking or working on normal ship type things he's cleaning them. No one else ever does, except for ONCE when Luffy and Usopp washed them in dirty water. And speaking of that, when the heck does Sanji eat, anyway? Whenever the crew is shown eating, Sanji is usually either serving the girls drinks or… WASHING THE DISHES!!! He's been shown eating (I think) once when he cooked himself that wasn't a party. That was on the little boat on the way to Arlong Park. The only other time was when he ate that little girl's food in the Warship Island filler arc. Does he eat any other time? If he does, tell me!

By the way, directly after eating Apis' (that's her name, right? Warship was unimportant and too far back) food, he washes the dishes. Sigh…

"_What do you think, Swordsman-san?"_

I'm bad with Robin's nicknames; it's Kenshi-san, which is Swordsman-san, right? Or wrong? Feel free to correct me!

"_This cut down on some… problems."_

The idea being he could shimmy in and out of his boxers without his fingers, making Chopper unnecessary. Which is good for him.

By the way, I'm not a ZoSan fan, as I said before, and never will be, but I know it kind of looks like it since Zoro has now taken off and replaced Sanji's pants. But this isn't a ZoSan fic anymore than it's a fic about Sanji's pants! But if you wanna look at it that way, whatever floats your boat. It's just not my intention.

_Even Robin was playing along, looking regal in her white cowboy hat._

I think Robin has awesome fashion sense! Though I'm also the girl who likes Bellemere's hair and thinks Buggy's hot, so I may not be the one to go to on these things. Heehee.

_Get me some eggs!"_

I hate eggs. Or at least I thought I hated eggs until I had this amazing Mexican dish this morning (made by one of my American friends for her Spanish class) made with scrambled eggs and tortilla and peppers and onions and all kinds of other good stuff… I had to literally fight the other people in my history class to get any. It was delicious! I'm trying to get the recipe.

_And thus the Straw Hats' cook returned home._

Meaning the kitchen. Just to clarify.

I found the ending kind of lame. Sorry.

No evil pirates today! Soon, though. Soon.

Happy Good Friday all you Catholic types! Though it actually ended eleven minutes ago and is now Saturday… so I actually fail at updating early! Darn it! Oh well. Wait! Maybe in your time zone it's still okay! So yay for people in other time zones!

Happy Easter everybody!

Oh, and as promised, Sweetie-kins is making another appearance for all her fans, as she insists on crawling from my lap to the keyboard and back. Ready, Sweetie?

Absdovifuqy34-9trbhnldskvfoiaweenhn

Translation: Good-night everyone! This is Dandy and Sweetie, signing off!


	4. Chapter 4

SORRY!!! This chapter is SO LATE! But I have good excus-er, reasons!

This was supposed to go up Sunday, but I ended up having history homework all day. I started at ten in the morning, and by the time I finished (at almost EIGHT at night!!!) I really didn't feel like writing. I even wrote "A Chef's Hands" at the top of a page and then was like, "Nope, not tonight." So I unwound with some _One Piece _and "Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged."

On Monday I had to update "Timeless."

Then yesterday, tragedy struck! My phone, my Nintendo DS, my Pokemon Emerald, and my Final Fantasy IV (that I just bought Saturday) were all stolen from my purse. How rude is that! So I really didn't feel like writing anything.

Sorry again!

On a side note, I just watched episode 174, which was finally a Robin fight episode! Woo! I love how she can totally OWN people without even moving. I had already decided to make this a Robin filled chapter anyway, so it was useful that she got an episode to herself just as I was preparing to write this. It helped me a lot with her personality. By the way, since I haven't seen Water 7 or Enies Lobby yet I don't know much about Robin, so I talk about Arabasta instead, but you can think of those arcs instead during that scene if you want. Another by the way: Robin is quickly becoming one of my absolute favorite characters. She's so cool!!!

**Important note: **Some of you may have seen, though most of you probably haven't, that I have a poll up on my profile regarding an epilogue for this fic. See, it was originally gonna really be SaNa in the extreme, but obviously it isn't anymore. So I thought I might add a special side epilogue for SaNa to make up for it. If you think this is a good idea, go vote. There's also a choice for if you want a SanRob epilogue instead. If there's enough interest, I may write both. Ooohhh!

**Reader Review Corner!**

ShaolinQueen: Thank you!

Dancing Nightmare: Yay, someone shares my sense of humor! And I'm glad you think so; that makes one of us! (I'm so self-deprecating, if that's even the word I'm looking for.) And thanks for confirming that; I don't feel like an idiot! Woo! Your review made me really happy, by the way (in case you couldn't tell =D).

Blueraven1999: I knew it! Darn… See, I took the scene with Nami out, then I put it back in, then I took it out, and then I changed it to a cigarette scene similar to the one in this chapter, then I changed it back… Ah well. And yes, I abuse Usopp quite frequently… But I still love him!

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A Chef's Hands

By Dandy Wonderous

Chapter 4

"Robin-chawn! Can you add basil to the list?"

"Of course, Cook-san."

"While you're at it, could you also add lettuce, kumquats, and pomegranates?"

"And meat!"

"Yes, Cook-san."

Almost a week had passed and life had mostly returned to normal aboard the _Going Merry_. They would arrive at the next island early in the morning, and Sanji was once again making a list of supplies (with a little help from Robin and far less help from Luffy) to stock up on. Usopp was working on sauce for supper, a new pasta dish the cook had been dieing to try. As a result, he was being a lot more demanding of the sniper than usual, kicking his backside hard whenever he messed up. But now the noodles were cooking and the sauce was simmering and Usopp was slumped in exhaustion at the table, watching the trio.

"Robin! Sanji! Meat!" Luffy whined, poking the list with one stretchy finger.

"Shithead!" Sanji kicked his incorrigible captain into the resting interim cook. "Don't pester Robin-chan!"

The kicking pair of boys rolled around in the floor while Usopp tried to untangle himself from the still whining rubberman. "Oi, jerk! What was that for?"

Sanji's head disappeared into the refrigerator. "You should be watching the sauce, not snoozing."

Usopp finally got to his feet and huffed over to the stove. Luffy slumped dejectedly at the table, still moaning about his precious meat.

"Robin-chawn! Please add sausage, eggs, bacon, and… steak to the list."

Robin's answer was drowned out by Luffy's happy cheering as he jumped from his seat. "Woo-hoo! MEAT!"

Usopp sighed, stirring the sauce some and then letting it rest against the sides of the pot. "Luffy, do you ever think about _anything_ else?"

The captain looked puzzled. "What's more important than meat?"

"Luffy," began Sanji slowly, a vein popping in his forehead. "Why don't you go bother Zoro instead?"

"He's sleeping," the boy answered cheerfully, not catching the hint.

Sanji mumbled something (most likely profane) and leaned over to check to list Robin held.

"Will that do, Cook-san?"

"Ah, Robin-chan, my lovely flower, you're too kind! That's everything we need; I won't trouble you further." He fluttered around her, the loss of his hands unable to impair his flirt-mode. "Would you perhaps like a drink? Oi, Usopp, get Robin-chan a drink!"

Now it was Usopp's turn to mumble; he set about finding the ingredients for one of the (insanely elaborate) drinks that Sanji often made for the girls.

"Why thank you, Cook-san, Long Nose-kun."

Nami and Chopper happened to wonder into the galley at that point, the doctor sniffing the air curiously. "Wow, something smells good!" he cried, hopping into the seat next to Luffy.

"Chopper!" the captain cried excitedly. "Guess what!"

"What?"

"We're getting sausage and bacon and STEAK tomorrow!"

Chopper laughed nervously at Luffy's cheer, deciding against explaining to the boy (yet again) why he didn't eat meat. "That's great, Luffy."

"Yosh!"

"Nami-swan! Would you like a special drink as well?"

"Yes, Sanji-kun, thank you."

"Hey, he's not the one making them; I am!"

"Yeah, and you better get it right this time! Last time there was so little flavor it was like drinking dish water!"

"What? Usopp, you idiot, how dare you insult Nami-swan's taste buds!"

The crew (minus the slaving Usopp and twittering Sanji) settled around the table. Robin returned to the book she had been reading while Nami studied a map she had purloined at the last stop, both girls effectively ignoring the idiotic song Luffy was amusing Chopper with. Sanji watched Usopp prepare the drinks with a critical eye, but, to the sniper's relief, nodded in satisfaction when they were finished. He twirled to the table and bowed elegantly.

"Your drinks, my lovely ladies."

CLUNK! CLUNK! Usopp dropped the drinks unceremoniously in front of the two and marched off to where the noodles were just finishing.

"Uncivilized little…" Sanji trailed off and crooned apologies to the girls, which were mostly ignored as they muttered their thanks and concentrated on their individual pursuits.

"I'm the one who made them," Usopp sulked, draining the noodles. He then wandered over to the simmering sauce to stir it.

Sanji, who had come over to inspect the stand-in's handiwork, noticed him going for the metal spoon out of the corner of his eye… and also realized that the _metal _spoon had been in the boiling sauce for the last several minutes.

He grabbed Usopp's wrist just in time, halting it only centimeters from the scorching utensil. "Idiot! Never leave a metal spoon in something boiling; you'll burn your hand."

Usopp caught sight of the red hot spoon and winced back. "Oh, thanks, Sanji. I almost…" Then he trailed off, staring down at his wrist in shock.

"Get a potholder," Sanji continued, "and then… Oi, Usopp, what's up?" Then his eyes traveled down to the other's wrist.

Where he had _grabbed _it only seconds before, his fingers still wrapped tightly in restraint.

The chef made a strangled noise, prying his fingers from Usopp's arm and holding them up in astonishment.

This attracted the others' attention; they all looked up from whatever they were doing to stare at the gaping pair.

"Sanji-kun, what…" Nami started, then hushed, realizing the significance of what just happened.

Slowly, very slowly, in obvious disbelief, Sanji closed the fingers of his right hand one at a time until it was curled into a fist. Then, just as slowly, he raised each one again until his palm was open in front of him.

"Oh, Sanji!" cried Chopper excitedly, happy tears flowing. "Your hand!"

"Huh," he said in agreement. "Would you look at that?"

He closed the fingers again and reopened them.

Luffy and Chopper cheered.

Sanji laughed, still in shock. "Would you look at that?" he repeated, and was promptly tackle-hugged by Luffy, Chopper, Usopp, and Nami, all cheering and laughing happily.

Robin laid her book down flat on the table, for once not bothering to hide her laughter.

* * *

That night the Straw Hat crew partied.

After all, it was a wonderful occasion; their cook was on the way to recovery.

Almost immediately Sanji had tried to start baking a cake but was swiftly admonished by Chopper, who reminded him that if he strained his hand too much the nerve damage might still be permanent. Of course, that hadn't stopped him from putting the finishing touches on their meal himself.

And it wasn't stopping him from smoking, he was sure of that.

The other crewmates (aside from Robin, who was on watch) had gone to bed, or really more like passed out in various positions around the ship. Now Sanji was alone, leaning against the railing, waiting for dawn and trying in vain to light a cigarette.

Okay, so maybe it _was_ stopping him from smoking.

He grudgingly realized that Chopper had been right; he couldn't strain his hand. He had barely done anything and already it was shaking too hard to use his lighter.

Frustrating, but still bearable. This time the day before he couldn't even _hold _the lighter.

So now he sat, trying to light up and getting nowhere, cigarette hanging limply in his mouth.

A hand, sprouting from the railing, snatched the lighter away from his trembling hand and lit it.

Sanji raised an eyebrow in surprise, then bent down and lit the cigarette. He took the lighter away and slipped it in his pocket. The hand disappeared in a shower of petals that faded into the wind.

He took a drag and blew the smoke steadily from his nose. "Thank you, Robin-chan."

"You're welcome, Cook-san." She walked up next to him and stared out at the sea.

He did likewise, and for several minutes they stayed that way, Sanji for once calming the instinct to fawn over her and instead enjoying the quiet moment between them.

"I'm happy for you, Sanji-san," she said suddenly, breaking the silence. The cook was startled at her use of his name, for a brief second wondering if she was merely commenting on the time.

"Robin-chan?"

"That you got your hands back," she clarified. "It's good that your dream isn't lost forever."

Sanji studied her carefully, but her face betrayed nothing; she was as inscrutable as ever, watching the waves swell and sink.

"Back in Arabasta," he said finally, looking back out to the sea and puffing on the cigarette. "When you said you had wanted to die… I didn't understand it then." He looked down at his newly mobile hand and then at the still dead one, wrapped tightly to keep the shattered bones in place. "But I understand now."

"Mmm… How so?"

"There were times in the last week…" He sighed, tracing the grains in the railing with one slender finger. "I knew how you felt."

Robin's eyes wandered up from the sea to the slowly fading stars. "Cook-san, what would you do if the All Blue didn't exist?"

Sanji took awhile in answering, taking many drags on the cigarette. "Just keep looking, I guess. Until I die."

Robin sighed. "You get tired of looking eventually."

He shrugged at that. "Maybe. But these guys keep it interesting, so even if I never find it, I won't be bored."

Robin laughed behind her hand. "That's true."

The silence settled in again. Sanji finished his cigarette and stamped it out under his foot. "It sucks, doesn't it?"

"What does?"

"That our dreams depend on if something exists or not. It has nothing to do with us or our skill, just… if it's even _there_."

Robin watched the horizon begin to turn pink. "But we look anyway."

"Yep."

"We could just get new dreams," she suggested.

"We could," he agreed. "But we won't."

She smiled wryly. "No, indeed we won't." She leaned down against the railing and put her chin in her hands. "And if we search the whole world and don't find what we're looking for? What then?"

He smiled that wide inviting grin that you couldn't help but smile back at. "Then we find a new world and look for it there."

She laughed lightly again. "Sounds like a plan to me, Cook-san."

* * *

"Are you sure they're docked here?"

"Of course I'm sure!" Danni scowled in disgust at his untrusting companion. He and Micki were slipping and slithering down side streets and back alleys, watching for any sign of their query.

"You haven't seen their ship before; what if you're mistaken?"

"The jolly roger had a STRAW HAT on it; it doesn't get more obvious than that!"

Micki couldn't deny that logic, so he followed behind his partner in silence. Or what he thought was silence.

"Don't make so much noise!" the scrawny man hissed. "Geez, you're like a frickin' elephant!"

"Hmph…" Micki stopped, peering back around a corner. "Hey, Danni," he hissed urgently.

"What!" It was more a snap than a question.

"Isn't that him?"

Danni looked where he was pointing to see the blond man further down the broad main street, trailed by a man with a long nose and what seemed to be a tanuki.

"That's him!" Danni cried, pointing, as though he had made the discovery. The snuck further down the alley until the found another opening closer to the stall the three were stopped at.

They watched as the chef picked up a grapefruit with his right hand and examined it with a discerning eye.

"Ugh, do you see that? Baron of Wimpsville didn't crush his hand enough." Danni rolled his eyes.

"That's the hand _you_ took out, Danni," Micki corrected smugly.

Danni scowled and spit angrily on the ground. He pulled out his dagger and ran it along his finger, provoking a small trail of blood to form. "I won't go lightly on him next time."

"Why did you just cut your hand?"

"Shut up."

The two slunk back into the shadows and headed for the dock.

* * *

Sanji turned away from the grapefruit to look over his shoulder and at the alley behind them. He frowned in confusion, but couldn't see anything.

"What's wrong, Sanji?" Usopp asked, looking up from some new gadget he had picked up earlier.

"I just had this feeling that someone was watching us…" He watched the alley a second longer, then shrugged and turned back to purchase the fruit. "Probably nothing."

"What if someone _was _watching us?" asked Chopper, worried.

"Don't worry, Chopper! The amazing Captain Usopp will protect you from any stalkers!"

"Wow, you're so cool, Usopp!"

"Your knees are shaking."

"Sh-sh-shut up, jerk!"

Sanji shrugged, tossing the fruit into the bag the sniper held. "It was nothing. Come on, we got a lot of things to find, and this time I'm making _sure_ Nami-san gets her map paper!"

Still, he cast one last glance at the alley before moving on.

**End of Chapter 4**

* * *

A/N: Finally I'm nice to Sanji, eh?

…_kumquats, and pomegranates…_

Inside joke time! I'm in band and play flute along with my three best friends. Band is, of course, the greatest elective ever to grace the school curriculum, but that's not what the joke is about. See, the four of us named out flutes. My flute's name is Kumquat, and he's a rebel. One of my friend's flutes is named Pomegranate, and she's kind of prissy. Kumquat and one of my other friend's flute, Sputnik, are always fighting for Pomegranate's attention. So there it is. Take that, Spazznik. (Yeah, we're freaks like that.)

The last flute's name is Frangipani, but she gets ignored most of the time (poor thing). All the names came from the book _Alas, Babylon_, which we were reading in English at the time. It's a great book, by the way.

"_Shithead!" _

As you may or may not notice, this is the only time our favorite foul mouthed cook cusses in this entire chapter. I know, end of the world right.

This is because my mom came up to my room and read it over my shoulder, and we got in a big fight about how I shouldn't cuss in my writing just because the character does. Said I was just encouraging it even though I don't talk that way. I think a good expletive enhances things, but I cleaned it up anyway. Remember children, don't talk like Sanji. Don't smoke, either!

"_Why don't you go bother Zoro instead?"_

Nope, Zoro's not in this one. I decided he's been tortured enough! (Actually, I had nothing for him to do.)

_Chopper laughed nervously at Luffy's cheer, deciding against explaining to the boy (yet again) why he didn't eat meat. _

At least, I don't _think _he does. That would be kind of creepy, wouldn't it?

_He grabbed Usopp's wrist just in time, halting it only centimeters from the scorching utensil. _

You thought I forgot, didn't you?

Okay, so you probably didn't, since it would be weird for me to forget the whole plot of the story right there. But I thought it would be fun to casually mention that his hand was suddenly working again just to see what would happen, and then be like, "Oh yeah, his hand is WORKING again." Was anyone fooled or surprised? Yes? No? Oh, well, I tried.

…_and was promptly tackle-hugged by Luffy, Chopper, Usopp, and Nami_…

TACKLE GLOMP!!!

_That night the Straw Hat crew partied._

Ain't no party like a Straw Hat party 'cuz a Straw Hat party don't stop.

And, as Nami has observed, they'll take any excuse to KANPAI!

_The cook was startled at her use of his name, for a brief second wondering if she was merely commenting on the time._

For those of you who don't watch subs or know Japanese, "Sanji" is another way of saying three o' clock. It was a pun in one of the episodes in Roguetown.

Sorry if Robin or Sanji get a little ooc, especially Robin because I don't know her very well yet, even if I think she's awesome.

…_what seemed to be a tanuki. _

Again, for those of you who don't watch subs, a tanuki is a raccoon dog. Chopper is often mistaken for one, which I don't understand because he looks like neither a raccoon nor a dog. He has ANTLERS, for crying out loud!

_Baron of Wimpsville…_

You guessed it; I still haven't thought of a name for him.

I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and I'm sorry again for the wait (I hope it was worth it!). Next time, the enemies finally rear their ugly heads. Dun dun dun!

Don't forget about the poll!

Mad that she has to get a new phone and DS, this is Dandy Wonderous, signing off!


	5. Chapter 5

I'm so sorry! I fail at updating on time, I know!!!

This took a long time because of the fights. I'm not a good fight scene writer. Also, their villain names still suck. And the author's notes took awhile. Forgive me!

Also, this fic is getting cut down a chapter. Not necessarily a bad thing, but still kind of sad. So there will only be six instead of seven (meaning it ends next chapter. Aww…). A few people have voted, but I would like to see some more! But I'm thinking of writing the extra epilogue anyway, and maybe an alternative SanRob epilogue later just because I like the couple.

**Reader Review Corner!**

Lolo popoki: Thank you for your review! It warmed my heart!

ShoalinQueen: Yes, it is happy. I hope this lives up to your expectations.

DancingNightmare: Yay, I fooled somebody! I is happy. And we've been in the same boat before, eh? Haha! Oh, we found the jerks who stole my stuff; a couple of sevies (seventh graders). As if I needed another reason to hate junior high schoolers. They gave me my stuff back after we started talking about payment and trial dates, but they scratched it up. It's times like these when I wish I had a Clima-tact or something…

Monkeypoo: No, this isn't a rewrite, though I'm sure the idea has been used before (stuff like this is obvious fanfic fodder). As for it having the same name, it wasn't on this site; I checked (unless it has since been deleted). And sorry Nami's in Zoro's space… I think… O.O

Blueraven: Just for you, an Usopp fight scene! For your apparent love of Usopp.

A special aside thank you to everyone who read and reviewed both "On The Hook" and "Claustrophobia." And again, thank you for your patience!

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A Chef's Hands

By Dandy Wonderous

Chapter 5

Sanji decided after returning to the ship to celebrate the return of his hand with a feast. Sure, they had already had a party, but now that they were restocked he could it right. And since when has any Straw Hat turned down a good party, anyway?

It wasn't as grand as some celebratory meals he had prepared in the past, but that was understandable with only one hand to work with. Still, there was quite a spread of soups, salads, meats, breads, and desserts. Everyone stared at it while Sanji stood back in quiet pride, eyes wide and mouths watering.

"Woo-hoo! Let's eat!" yelled Luffy, abruptly breaking the silence.

And then everyone was talking at once, rushing to fill their plates before everything disappeared into their captain's fifty gallon mouth.

"It looks wonderful, Sanji-kun!"

"Not as wonderful as you, Nami-swan!"

"Truly delicious, Cook-san."

"Only the best for my Robin-chwan! Oi, shitheads, let the ladies in first! And Luffy, there's seven other people here, you know!"

"But this meat is SO GOOD!"

"That doesn't mean you can eat it all!"

"This is great, Sanji!"

"Thanks, Chopper."

"Better than mine?"

"Erm, well, Usopp, he _is _the cook…"

"Haha, calm down, Chopper, I was kidding!"

"You must be. This is way better than that crap you made."

"Z-z-zoro! Jerk! You didn't have to be _that_ blunt about it!"

And thus the party raged on, fully of merriment and much kanpai-ing. Slowly the sun sank beyond the western horizon.

* * *

"You're sure this is the ship?"

"Aye, Captain."

"Very well. You three better not fail me this time." The captain fingered the handle of his giant butcher knife.

"Aye, Captain!"

* * *

The food was gone and everyone was settling down somewhat, except for the three youngest crew members who were dancing to some ridiculous song of Luffy's invention. Sanji sat at the table with the others, smoking a cigarette and watching his nakama's antics with amusement.

"That's a lot of dirty dishes," Nami observed candidly. "And _someone's_ gonna have to wash them." She threw a pointed look at Zoro.

"The hell? I ain't washin' the dishes." The swordsman glared at her.

"That's fine. I'll just up your interest another five percent, and we'll call it even."

He sighed, defeated. "Devil woman."

Sanji smiled broadly. "Nami-san's so lovely when she's blackmailing others."

Zoro shot him a look. "You're lucky I'm in a good mood, dartboard."

The cook shrugged, in a good mood himself. "Just leave 'em; I'll wash 'em later."

"Are you sure, Cook-san? We could help-"

"I would never have lovely Robin-chan wash dishes!"

Robin was about to answer when Zoro held up his hand for silence. The trio kept up their atrocious singing but the other three looked at him in confusion before listening intently themselves.

After a few seconds of hearing nothing, Robin spoke up. "What is it, Swordsman-san?"

"I thought I heard someone on deck," he explained slowly, still concentrating.

"But we're all in here," Nami pointed out. When he didn't answer she crossed her arms and shook her head. "I don't hear anything; you're probably just drunk."

"No," said Robin, now fully alert. "I think I hear it, too." She crossed her arms and muttered, "Ojos Fleur." The other three waited with bated breath until she opened her eyes again, arms falling to her sides. "Three men are sneaking around on deck."

Zoro nodded toward Luffy, Usopp, and Chopper. "Let them keep going; it's better if they don't know we're on to them."

The others nodded, then rose as one and slowly advanced to the door.

Usopp noticed them first; he broke free from the chorus line and looked at them curiously. "Oi, guys, what's up?"

"Enemies," said Robin casually.

It probably wasn't the best plan; Usopp immediately went into his weak-kneed stance of fear. "O-o-on the ship?"

Nami nodded, then turn and held a warning finger to her lips. He nodded back and quieted, though his knees continued to quake. Luffy and Chopper remained blissfully ignorant.

Zoro pushed open the galley door with a soft creak and the four stepped out into the moonlight. The swordsman glanced around, but the three intruders had concealed themselves somewhere. He walked down the stairs onto the main deck casually and went to stand by the mast, pretending to be interested in the stars. The others waited silently by the galley door. From inside the tone-deaf trio continued to bust their vocal chords.

A spinning blade appeared from the shadows and whirled towards Zoro, who dodged in the nick of time. The weapon imbedded itself in the mast. It was circular, and Sanji felt a strange twinge of recognition.

"So that's where the rats were hiding," said Zoro, two katana already out and ready. Sanji and Robin jumped over the railing to stand beside him while Nami ducked back into the galley to alert the rest of the crew.

"Come on out," ordered Sanji, taking one last drag on his spent cigarette before crushing it under his heel. "You're ruining our party."

"Wait for me!" cried an excited voice, and then their captain was standing next to the three by the mast, peering into the darkness. "Who is it?" he asked curiously. Chopper, Usopp, and Nami remained by the galley door.

Knowing they could no longer hide, the three enemies emerged and stood exposed in the moonlight. A giant of a man holding a large gun, a dignified man in a suit, and a short, weasel-ly looking man holding a long dagger.

Sanji's eyes widened in recognition; he gritted his teeth and curled his right hand into a fist.

Robin caught the motion and assessed the situation. Realizing what was going on, she decided to alert the others by asking softly, "Cook-san?"

Zoro glanced at the blond and noticed his tension. His eyes narrowed. "Oi. These the guys who…?"

"Yeah. These are them."

Zoro studied him for another second then smirked, looking back to the men. "Well, I was in a good enough mood to just kick them off the ship, but now I think an ass beating is in order."

"Wait, you mean…" Luffy interrupted, trying to catch up. Then realization dawned. "THESE ARE THE GUYS THAT HURT SANJI!?!"

"Geez, you're slow," groaned Nami, Usopp, and Zoro together.

"Ahem." The suit man, his top hat still buried in the mast, cleared his throat to get their attention. "I assume you are Monkey D. Luffy, the captain of this fine… crew?" He said the word as though it were a ridiculous overstatement.

"Yeah," he answered simply.

"Ah. Then allow me to introduce myself." He bowed elegantly, moving his hand as though the top hat were still there to remove. "I am Baron Colfelt, first mate of the Golden Chef crew sailing on the good ship _Marmalade_."

"_Marmalade_?" repeated Robin, hiding a laugh.

"You got a problem with that?" the short man snarled.

"I only found it amusing," she replied truthfully, and he glared at her.

"Ahem," Colfelt began again, demanding their attention. "These are my associates, Micki," he gestured at the big man. "And this outspoken man is Danni." Now he waved at the other. "We have come for only one reason, and that is to kill your chef." He nodded at Sanji, who glared back at him. "We apologize for mistakenly attacking the sword wielding gentleman." He nodded at Zoro, who likewise glared back.

"Jerk!" yelled Usopp from his spot with Chopper and Nami by the galley door. "What makes you think we're just gonna let you kill him?"

Micki looked up at Usopp with dangerous eyes, and the sniper took a step back and slightly behind Nami.

"We had no reason to assume so," Colfelt answered, still as calm as before. "But we hoped to make this all as painless as possible. Hand him over now and we won't have to hurt or kill any of the rest of you."

Luffy cracked his knuckles and glared darkly at Colfelt. "No way."

The man sighed and held up his arms in exasperation. "Have it your way, then." He crouched into a fighting stance. "Danni, Micki. Let's go."

"Do you really think that wise?" asked Robin coolly. "There are seven of us and only three of you. You are overwhelmingly outnumbered…" She crossed her arms and smiled. "Not to mention completely outmatched."

"Yes, I suppose that is a problem," said Colfelt, though he looked as disturbingly unperturbed as the archeologist did. "Micki, do you plan to do anything about that?"

"Yes sir," he answered and without warning turned the large gun on the three by the galley door.

The massive bullet sailed over their heads and split open, a net falling onto them. It wrapped around Nami and Chopper, but Usopp managed to dodge and scramble away.

Doctor and navigator struggled against the net, but it was incredibly heavy and resisted all efforts to tear it away.

"You remember my ability, don't you?" Colfelt asked, watching their attempts with amusement. "I can turn any cloth or material into metals. That net has been turned into very strong steel, and it's weighted, like all good nets, so they can't get away."

Usopp glanced down at the men and gasped. "Hey, where's the third one?"

Zoro and Sanji cursed simultaneously; they had been so focused on Colfelt's explanation that they hadn't noticed the shrimp sneaking off. He had hurried up to the net and with two punches knocked out the trapped strugglers. "Nighty-night," he crooned mockingly.

"Nami-san!"

"Chopper!"

Sanji jumped up to get to Danni, but he proved to be fast, running off to the front of the ship. "Come back here, bastard!"

"Sanji!" yelled Usopp, running past him. "I'll go after him; you help take care of those guys."

The cook stared at him for a split second, then nodded and turned back while Usopp gave chase.

Meanwhile, Zoro had launched himself at Colfelt and was swinging with all his might. His opponent blocked the blows effortlessly with his hard-as-steel sleeves, smirking.

"Viente Fleur!" Twenty of Robin's hands appeared, wrapping themselves around Colfelt and holding him still. Luffy rushed past Zoro and began his own attack.

"Gomu Gomu no Pistol!"

The man jerked back, taking the full punishment of the blow to his face, only Robin's hands keeping him from flying into the sea.

Then there was a scream of pain and her hands disappeared in a burst of petals. Robin fell to the deck, unconscious, hit in the head with the handle of one of Micki's pistols.

"Robin-chan!" yelled Sanji, running at the huge man. He spun into a kick that met with the gunner's gut, and he grunted and staggered back.

_Shit. That should have sent him flying._ Instead, he felt the force jar his whole leg and pelvis. This wasn't good.

Colfelt was back on his feet. He rubbed off some blood that had trickled down his chin and looked around at the remaining Straw Hats. "And then there were three."

_

* * *

_

Ah, man! Where'd he go?

The front deck was strangely empty, Danni nowhere in sight. Usopp looked around in confusion; there wasn't anywhere to hide out here.

To be sure, he walked to the very front of the ship by the figurehead and turned back, examining the ship from a different angle.

_Maybe he went back, or maybe he-_ "Ugh!"

The dagger's blade sunk into his thigh from below, and he looked down in horror to see Danni clinging to the underside of the figurehead, smiling up at him.

"Ow!" yelled Usopp as the other man yanked the blade free. He scrambled backward, favoring the hurt leg, as Danni clambered back over the rail and smirked at him.

"I saw the way you hid behind that girl," he taunted. "You're the wimp of the group, I'm guessing."

"Oh yeah? You think so, jerk?" Usopp stood straight and smiled at him dangerously. "Well, you're wrong. I'm the real captain of this ship: Captain Usopp!"

Danni quirked an eyebrow. "Then why are your knees shaking?"

"Sh-sh-sh-shut up!" He pulled out his slingshot and loaded a lead pachinko pellet, which he aimed at Danni. "It'll be no problem for the great Captain Usopp to take you out!"

His opponent laughed. "Yeah right. I'd like to see you try."

Usopp obliged. "Namari Boshi!" The lead ball was perfectly on target but Danni batted it away with his dagger. Then he ran at the sniper, weapon raised.

"Is that all?"

Usopp back stepped quickly and ran backwards across the deck, loading another pellet. "Hissatsu Kayaku Boshi!"

This time the pellet connected and exploded, sending Danni reeling. He hit the deck and skid back a little before stopping and glaring up at the sniper.

"I think I get it," said Usopp, voice low. "You're the wimp of _your_ group; that's why you had to hide under the figurehead to hurt me."

Danni gritted his teeth and staggered back to his feet. "You wish." He lunged forward again, but Usopp was already running in the other direction.

"Tabasco Boshi!"

The hot sauce missed Danni's face purely because the man was just as quick and agile as Usopp. Still, it managed to knock into his shoulder.

He growled at Usopp. "Aren't you going to do anything besides run away?"

Usopp smiled back at him. "Maybe I won't this time."

"Psh, yeah right. You're a big chicken, and you're gonna run again. Ba-gawk!" And then he came running full speed, actually seeming faster than before.

This time, Usopp didn't run. He held his ground until Danni was close, and then sidestepped. "Usopp Hammer!"

The hammer connected with Danni's gut.

The man gasped, the wind completely knocked from him.

Now Usopp was on a roll. "Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! U-sopp! Ham-mer! Usopp Wagomu. USOPP HAMMER!!!"

The man lay in a whimpering heap on the deck while Usopp eyed his handiwork. "That's what you get when you face the mighty Captain Usopp!"

* * *

…"Jerk!" yelled Luffy angrily, glaring at Colfelt. "Stop hurting my nakama!"

"Gladly, as soon as you surrender your chef."

Luffy yelled in fury and sprung forward. "Gomu Gomu no Bazooka!" His palms slammed into Colfelt's chest.

The man staggered back several steps, winded but otherwise uninjured. Luffy, however cringed and wringed his hands. "Ow! What was that?"

"The Cotton Cotton no Mi," Sanji supplied. "He can make his clothes as hard as steel."

BANG!

Micki was completely ignoring the rules of good battle etiquette, attacking in the middle of a conversation. The bullet from his pistol met with Luffy's back and ricocheted off.

"What the…?" The big man looked confused.

Zoro was in front of him in a instant. "That won't work on Luffy," he said with a smirk, and then he was attacking the man.

Like with Colfelt, his attacks merely pinged off Micki's shirt. Sanji rubbed his now-bruised leg ruefully.

"His clothes have been changed, too."

"I noticed, ero-cook. Luffy, aim for his face!"

"Yosh!" Luffy grabbed the mast and whipped his leg around. "Gomu Gomu no Muchi!"

Colfelt ducked the kick and rolled to the mast, springing up and wrenching his top hat blade free. "You're made of rubber, right? Well, even rubber can be pierced!" He spun the blade toward him.

Luffy dodged the hat, then stopped to watch it spin with wide eyes. "Wow! Do you think my hat can do that?"

"Pay attention, idiot!" yelled both Zoro and Sanji at the same time.

PHWIP PHWIP PHWIP!!! The blade came spinning back toward the captain, who ducked it again. It boomeranged to Colfelt, who flung it again.

"Maybe _you_ should be paying attention!"

Zoro barely had time to move before Micki shot at his side, grazing his side. He danced to away and glared at the gunman.

"You're really starting to piss me off, you know." He pulled out Wado Ichimonji and placed it in his mouth. "Oni Giri!"

Micki cocked his head to the side. "Ongiri?"

And then Zoro slammed into him, slashing through with all three swords at once.

"AAH!"

Sanji watched as Micki hit the deck in a pool of blood, unconscious. "Wha… But I thought his shirt was made of steel."

Zoro shrugged, nudging the man with one foot contemptuously. "Looks like it was just his fat gut."

The cook sighed in exasperation.

Meanwhile, Luffy was trying to get a shot at Colfelt's head, but the man was keeping the blade hot. He would set up and then have to dodge the hat again. "Cut it out!"

"We have to stop that blade," Sanji observed.

Zoro nodded. "Leave it to me." He waited for the next throw, and then jumped between it and Luffy.

CLANG! The hat smacked into Zoro's katana and then clattered to the ground.

"Thanks, Zoro," said Luffy, before turning back to Colfelt. "Gomu Gomu no Bazooka!"

This time he made sure to hit the other's face.

Zoro looked from the unconscious man at Luffy's feet to the other by Sanji, who was observing the scene while producing a new cigarette. "That all of them?"

"If Usopp got the last one."

Usopp appeared at that moment, laughing loudly. "Yosh! I took care of the fearsome enemy pirate! Cower before the might of Captain Usopp!"

"That's all."

"Yosh! We kicked their butts!" Luffy cheered, hands in the air.

"Yeah," said Sanji, trying to sound happy and ignore the fact that he had been completely useless. He walked up to the galley and tugged at the net with his good hand, only feeling increasingly depressed when he couldn't get it free. Usopp came over and helped without a word.

"Hey!"

Everyone stopped what they were doing to turn and look at the railing. A new figure pulled itself over the side of the ship and stood there, glaring at them. It was a big man, not as big as Micki but close, with a black mustache that curled slightly at the ends and black hair in a military cut. He was wearing a white apron over simple red clothes and held a large meat cleaver in one hand.

"I see my subordinates failed," he huffed, looking from one unconscious man to the other.

"So you're the captain," said Zoro, glaring at the older, heavy browed man.

"Yes. I am Captain Servace, the Golden Chef!"

Sanji distinctly snorted in annoyance.

"Service?" said Luffy in confusion.

"No, Ser_vace_. With an "A"."

Luffy thought about it for a moment, then hit his hand with his fist. "Ah! Serv-ASS!" Then he laughed. "That's a funny name."

Servace glared at him before continuing. "I've come here for Sanji the chef."

Sanji jumped over the railing and stepped forward, the unlit cigarette still dangling from his lips. "So you're the one who thinks he can just eliminate his competition?"

Servace snorted. "To say you're my competition would imply that we are _equal_ in skill."

Sanji laughed, pulling out his lighter with his right hand. "That's true. I'm clearly a better chef than you are."

Servace's brow furrowed. "No one is better than me."

"Heh, yeah. That's why you have to destroy every cook in your way." He flicked the lighter and lit his cigarette.

"It makes no difference what you think of my methods," Servace said darkly. "I'm going to kill you here and now."

"We'll see."

Usopp grew worried as the air grew heavy between the two men. "Zoro, Luffy, shouldn't we do something to help?"

"No," answered Luffy, his eyes not leaving his nakama. "This is Sanji's fight."

Zoro nodded, sheathing all his katana.

Usopp gulped and nodded as well, looking back at the stare down.

Next to him, Nami and Chopper slowly sat up, rubbing their heads. "What's going on?" Chopper asked, looking around out of one wincing eye.

"Sanji's going to fight the captain of the enemy pirates," he whispered back.

Robin had woken as well, and she got to her feet and joined Zoro and Luffy.

All eyes turned on their nakama as he prepared to fight the man who almost ruined his life.

**Chapter 5 End**

* * *

A/N: I hope that wasn't too lame. Anyway, on with the notes! There's a bunch…

_And since when has any Straw Hat turned down a good party, anyway?_

I just finished Skypiea and watched the mandatory party scene. Yay! Skypiea was an excellent arc but now on to CP9!

"_I am Baron Colfelt, first mate of the Golden Chef crew sailing on the good ship Marmalade."_

I was in my shower trying to think up names and quite randomly "Marmalade" popped into my head. Yes, it's totally pointless and makes no sense.

"_There are seven of us and only three of you. You are overwhelmingly outnumbered…" _

Excellent point, Robin. I should knock out some of you. Heh heh…

"_Chopper!"_

Episode 174-ish (maybe 175), Zoro finds Chopper knocked out and acts pretty concerned. I thought it was cute. I actually have a drabble fic idea inspired by it. Oh, and there was Sanji being his typical self and worrying about the girls first.

"_Namari Boshi!" _

I left all Usopp's attacks in Japanese since he's just normal old Usopp right not. This means _Lead Star_.

"_Hissatsu Kayaku Boshi!"_

A.k.a. the _Sure-kill Gunpowder Star._

"_Tabasco Boshi!"_

Self explanatory.

"_Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! U-sopp! Ham-mer! Usopp Wagomu. USOPP HAMMER!!!"_

Every good _One Piece_ fan knows that if Usopp's going to use his hammer, he's also going to use his Usopp Wagomu: _Usopp Rubberband_. I knew I had to fit it in somewhere; it's one of my favorite _One Piece_ gags!

_Micki was completely ignoring the rules of good battle etiquette, attacking in the middle of a conversation. _

Because in any anime (or show in general), you can't attack while people are talking; it simply isn't polite!

…_springing up and wrenching his top hat blade free_.

Those of you who have ever read _The Looking Glass Wars_, yes, there is some Hatter M. influence here. But his hat doesn't go completely flat, the brim is just razor sharp. It isn't aerodynamic, but physics and _One Piece_ aren't exactly the best of friends.

_Zoro shrugged, nudging the man with one foot contemptuously. "Looks like it was just his fat gut."_

Or Zoro's technique was just too hot to handle. Or the author was sick of Micki. Either way. Oh, and if you don't know, Oni Giri means Demon Slash.

Um, I think that's it. Next is the big finale fight between Sanji and Captain Servace! Woo! Hopefully I'll get it out sooner this time.

Hope you enjoyed!

This is glad to finally have her stuff back Dandy Wonderous, signing off.


	6. Chapter 6

Here it is; the finale! It's shorter than some of the other chapters, but it took the longest due to the fight scene, which I was doing my best to make not lame. I would have had this up sooner, but my friends and I are trying to make a webshow and we're having uploading nightmares… Sigh.

Today (or rather-looks at clock-yesterday) was my last day of school. Technically, I don't get out until Friday, but I'm exempt from my semester tests (score!) and don't have to go anymore. Woo-hoo, summer! And I am now officially a senior! Oh, and more good news: I made drum major for my band! Woo!!!

So anyway, this is the last chapter of "A Chef's Hands"! It's happy and sad. I'm glad I get to move on to new projects, but also sad to see it go. In a fit of nostalgia I reread most of it before writing this, just because. I really can't believe it's finished! It's crazy!

About the epilogue: there were only two people who said, "NO!!!" and six people said "YES!!!" and two more said, "SanRob!" So I am going to write the SaNa epilogue, but not immediately; it may be a ways down the road. That's why the status bar doesn't say "Complete" yet even though the summary does.

I may still be tempted to write the SanRob one, but we'll have to see.

For those of you uninterested in an epilogue, particularly a SaNa one, never fear; the story DOES end here, so there's nothing you're missing; it's just pointless after fluff.

As for future projects, I have a teaser for my next big _One Piece_ fanfic at the end of this chapter! It's gonna be a Zoro/Sanji nakamaship fic of epic proportions! Fun! I hope to start in June, but there's some oneshots and drabbles I want to do, first.

**Reader Review Corner!**

I'm glad all of you were cheering Sanji on! Woo! Go, fight, win!

Mysterious Panther: YES! Burn up the competition with your fiery passion!!! (just weirded herself out a little)

ShaolinQueen: Thanks! And yes, Luffy's slow, but that's why we love him! Hope you enjoy this.

Dancing Nightmare: Woohoo! Everyone's so pumped up, it's contagious, even at two in the morning! And yeah, it's just plain rude. Usopp was fun. I enjoy writing him.

Daschel: Thank you! And yeah, my heart sank there, too, when I reread it earlier. Does that make me a hack? But Sanji is the best, no? Woo!

Blueraven: Thanks! And yeah, it's what made me first start liking Usopp (before that, I admit to thinking he was just annoying, though I thought it was cute with him and Kaya). After that I loved him just as much as the rest of the Straw Hats. Hope you enjoy this!

And now, with no more gilding the lily, the finale!

**

* * *

**

A Chef's Hands

By Dandy Wonderous

Chapter 6

The tense stand-off continued for several moments, neither man wanting to make the first move. Then Servace huffed loudly and pulled the meat cleaver off his belt.

"Choose your weapon," he barked, raising it for battle.

Sanji glared back at him through the cigarette smoke. "That isn't for fighting, you know."

"To serve me well in the kitchen, it must also serve me well on the battlefield." He studied the edge, running one calloused finger along it gently.

The younger cook made a face. "Those utensils are for food, not people."

"Whatever. Either way, you still have to choose your weapon."

"Don't worry, they're always on me." He stepped forward with one leg.

Servace clearly didn't get it; he stared at Sanji in confusion. "What, I see nothing."

"Then maybe you should get your eyes checked." He tapped his foot on the boards impatiently.

Realization dawned. "Your feet, huh? Well, I suppose that makes sense, seeing as you can't use your hands right now."

Sanji smirked around his cigarette. "Either way, my legs are all I need to kick your shitty ass back to your shitty ship."

"I'd like to see you try," he scoffed.

"Just remember, you asked for it." And he launched himself forward, jumping for a midair kick.

Servace dodged just in time, leaping from the railing. Sanji's foot slammed down where he had been milliseconds previously, splintering the wood like it was a toothpick.

From the galley door Usopp started to protest, but Nami's warning look stopped him.

Sanji bounced back to the main deck to come into the path of the swinging meat cleaver. He danced backward from the dangerous instrument, just bending enough that it didn't catch him in the stomach. After a few seconds of the awkward retreat he dropped to the ground and spun his leg, using his right hand to steady himself and help his swing. It smacked into Servace's legs, who stumbled back a few inches before swinging the meat cleaver like an axe at his midsection. Sanji rolled and jumped back on his feet, just barely avoiding yet another whistling swing.

He hopped back a few steps and looked down at his stomach. "Shithead. This is my favorite suit jacket," he complained, putting a finger through the new rip in annoyance, though secretly glad that it was all that got shredded.

"So what? Fancy clothes aren't needed to cook."

"No, but they are needed to impress the ladies… Of course, I'm sure that's nothing a _brute_ like yourself could ever understand."

Sanji jumped forward again, spinning his leg around once in range at the man's chest. "Poitrine!"

A huge muscular arm blocked the kick, and while Sanji knew it must have smarted, Servace seemed unfazed. "Pathetic."

Sanji used the block to push himself up and swing his other leg down at his head. "Joue!"

Servace took this hit and stumbled back while Sanji landed a few feet away, straightening up. A thin trickle of blood leaked from where his foot had connected, but Servace was otherwise unharmed.

"By the way," the younger cook began conversationally as the two began a slow circle. "Where exactly do you cook? I mean, do you have a restaurant, or…"

"I _had_ a restaurant before I took to becoming the best," the other answered, sounding cocky and sure. "It was on Palm Island. Right on the beach, highly rated."

"Really? We went to Palm Island; what was it called?"

"_Servace's_, of course."

Sanji rolled his eye. _Could this shithead be any more conceited?_ And then he remembered something; he realized that Servace's name had seemed familiar before, though he hadn't thought about it then. "Wait, I think… Yeah, we ate there."

The other crewmembers thought back to Palm Island; it had been quite some time ago, right after they left Arabasta…

"We did?" asked Usopp in confusion.

"Oh yeah, I remember that," said Nami, nodding. "We decided to eat there and give Sanji-kun a break."

"I never need a break from cooking for you, Nami-san!" Sanji cooed, flirt mode starting despite the situation.

Servace took this moment when he was seemingly distracted to come rushing at the love-cook.

Sanji, all too aware of his opponent, weaved to the side and spun his foot at Servace's gut. "Flanchet!"

Servace took the hit and stumbled back again, winded. Sanji glared at him, blowing out a good deal of smoke from his cigarette. "Don't interrupt Nami-san!"

The big chef took a few breaths to steady himself and then glared at the blond. "So you went to my restaurant, eh? How was it?"

Sanji took a thoughtful drag. "Well, the salad was limp and couldn't have been the freshest. The wine was a good grade, but certainly not exquisite. The filet mignon was too dry; I had to add sauce, when I shouldn't have had to. The dessert wasn't half bad, but the pie crust was underdone and too doughy. And I know that there's no way you could have gotten Nami-san's mikan daiquiri the way she likes it. Not to mention that Robin-chan's grilled chicken was too tough." He studied his cigarette for a moment. "I don't care what you did to _their_ food," he concluded, jerking his thumb at Luffy and Zoro.

"It was good!" observed Luffy, though as he would eat anything it wasn't saying much. "But I still like Sanji's better."

"Now that you mention it," said Nami slowly, thinking back. "I remember that the food was _okay_, but nothing like Sanji-kun's." _Of course, after eating _his _food for three meals a day, even the finest cooks in the most expensive restaurants aren't very impressive._

"Yeah, Sanji's is better!" Usopp cheered.

"Way better!" echoed Chopper.

"But mine is far more-"

"Shut up, Usopp."

"Yes, Nami."

Servace was growing livid. "I don't know what any of you are talking about!" he yelled. "I cook the best food in all the world!"

"Perhaps the best food on the island," said Sanji, finishing his cigarette and stamping it out under his foot. "But definitely not the best food on the Grand Line, much less the world. After all, if it was, you wouldn't need to keep me from cooking, would you?"

With a roar, Servace charged at Sanji like a wild boar. He anticipated the attack, got ready to roll to the left and counter with a kick to the man's head-

Servace changed tactics in mid-attack, suddenly swinging his fist from the other side and hitting Sanji square in the jaw. Before he could react, the bigger man was swinging the meat cleaver. It bit into Sanji's right thigh and he gasped in pain before falling to the deck and rolling several feet.

"Sanji-kun!" cried Nami.

The chef started to push himself up using his right hand, but a foot slammed into his chest and he was winded. He flopped back to the deck, fighting to catch his breath.

"Sanji!" Chopper wailed.

"You insulted my restaurant," Servace growled. "You didn't expect me to just let you get away with that, did you?" He stepped forward and kicked Sanji's shoulder, right where, just over a week before, his subordinate had stabbed him with a dagger. The wound was mostly healed, but the blow hurt far worse than it should have, and Sanji gasped again, and tried to grip it with his left hand, only to be thwarted by the cast.

"This is now more than just a duel of reputation," Servace continued, advancing again. "It is a fight to the death for our honor!"

Sanji tensed on the ground, every muscle in his body going stiff. But it was not in anticipation of another blow; it was from outrage.

His whole body trembled violently, but it wasn't from pain; it was in restraint, so he would not beat Servace's head off.

Slowly, very slowly, Sanji stood up. He was slumping a little, shoulder still throbbing, leg pulsing in pain, but he didn't care about that now.

"Honor?" he repeated, voice low and dangerous. "What do you know about _honor, _you shithead?"

He took a step forward, and he looked so demonic, bangs shadowing his one visible eye, that Servace actually retreated a step. "You worry more about reputation than the quality of your cooking. You use your cooking utensils for battle. You have your subordinates hurt ladies. You stoop to destroying other cooks' hands, _their livelihood_, for your own gain. And you call all that _honorable_!?!" He spat on the deck. "You don't know the first thing about _honor_! You don't know SHIT!"

So saying, he jumped into the air to attack Servace again. "Collier!"

Servace managed to move his head in time, but his shoulder bore the brunt of Sanji's attack; there was a satisfying crunch and Sanji knew he had broken something in Servace's arm. He used the force to twirl in midair and bring his other leg down into his chest. Servace grunted in pain and stumbled back, nearly falling, while Sanji landed neatly before him and began a second wave.

This time Servace was prepared; he blocked with his uninjured arm and swung with the meat cleaver with his hurt one, forcing Sanji to dodge away. The younger cook lost his balance and fell, twisting to catch himself.

Unfortunately, he followed his battle instinct. Right now, his battle instinct was telling him to land on his left hand and jump immediately back into a kick at Servace's chest, but it hadn't taken into account the cast.

Sanji's left hand landed with a loud bang on the deck and he crumpled onto it.

"Sanji!" yelled Usopp and Chopper together.

"Sanji-kun!" added Nami.

Luffy, Zoro, and Robin watched on in silence.

"Guess you still can't work very well with that bum hand, eh?" taunted Servace, watching him. "Isn't that cast a little clunky? Why don't you take it off?"

Sanji got up off his hand and sat there for a moment, as though thinking about something. Then he stood up and turned to face them all.

The tape holding the brace in place was clenched in his teeth, and he was trying as hard as he could to rip it apart.

"What are you doing!?!" yelled Usopp in shock.

"You can't do that!" admonished Chopper. "Your hand will-"

"Chopper!"

The reindeer hushed, looking down at Luffy in confusion and worry.

His captain smiled broadly. "Don't worry; Sanji knows what he's doing."

Meanwhile, Sanji was gnawing at the tape and cast, trying to get them to loosen. With his right hand he tugged at the fingers. "Shitteh cas'," he muttered around the mouthful of brace and tape. "Co' off!"

A kitchen knife that had grown a pair of feet appeared in front of him, and he bent to retrieve them gratefully. "Thanks, Robin-chan." Then he worked the sharp blade into the opening he had created and sliced through the cast.

It fell away, revealing Sanji's sweaty and bruised left hand.

Then, to Nami, Usopp, and Chopper's shock (the rest had expected such, except perhaps Luffy, who simply believed in his nakama), he curled each finger slowly into a fist and then straightened them back out, one at a time.

Then he grinned at Servace. "Yeah, that _was _a good idea; wonder why I didn't think of it sooner."

Servace scowled. "So your other hand still works; that'll just make it more fun to crush them again."

"I'm not letting you touch them ever again!" And then Sanji went once more into the breach, and this time he was unleashing his full fury.

_Ribs, chest, back, legs…_ Sanji twirled in a dance of anger and violence around Servace, hitting every part of him in quick succession. Soon he was in his trademark handstand… finally with both hands holding him up. "Cotelette! Selle!" He spun his legs, first into his ribs, then into his back. Then he was right behind Servace.

"Anti-Manner Kick COURSE!!!"

His leg slammed up into Servace's spine, sending him flying and then skidding across the deck. Sanji glared after him, then huffed in contempt and looked away, reaching into his pocket for a new cigarette.

Slowly, Servace rose back to his feet…

And the sound of a cocking pistol froze Sanji with the cigarette partway to his lips.

"I WILL be the best!" Servace roared, and fired.

Sanji, luckily, moved in time, spinning off to the side. The bullet embedded itself harmlessly in the cabin wall.

"Why you-!"

"Luffy! You said to let Sanji handle this, remember!?!" cried Zoro, restraining his captain. The rubberman calmed and stood back, but he didn't seem at all happy about it.

Servace started to fire again, but Sanji was ducking and weaving toward him, cigarette forgotten on the deck behind him. The blond chef jumped and spun over his head, landing behind him again. This time, he kicked Servace down flat and wrenched the gun from his hands.

Then Sanji was straddling the bigger man, holding the gun and glaring in hate and anger, first at his hands, then at Servace, back and forth.

Then, slowly, he lowered the gun barrel to rest on Servace's unprotected right hand.

He lingered there, breathing heavily, pointer finger stroking the trigger.

"Go ahead," the defeated chef growled. "Do it. I took your hands, now you can take mine."

Sanji just glared down at the gun, at the man who had made his life miserable, who had almost ruined it forever.

"Sanji-kun," whispered Nami.

Sanji's finger tensed on the trigger. He considered.

Then he pulled.

The bullet flew from the raised gun and up into the air, disappearing into the sky.

When no pain exploded in Servace's hand, he growled angrily. "Don't you get it, idiot. This is your chance for revenge!"

"Are you really complaining, shithead?" Sanji asked scornfully. He brought his arm down and flung the gun into the sea. "I don't see a reason to."

"But why?"

"Why?"

Sanji got off the man's back and walked back to where he had dropped his cigarette.

"Because, unlike you, I could never take another chef's livelihood, no matter how bad-or _good_-they were."

And with that, he retrieved his cigarette, lit it, and walked past his nakama to the galley door.

"So…" he asked slowly, looking at Nami pointedly. "Would you like a drink, Nami-san?"

"Sanji-kun," she whispered again.

And then she hit him. "Don't scare me like that!"

"Aah! My apologies, Nami-san! You are most beautiful when you're rightfully angry!"

Before he could say much more, she was hugging him, and so were Usopp and Chopper, and one of Robin's hands was on his shoulder.

All Sanji could do-all he _wanted_ to do-was sink into their hug and smile.

* * *

Zoro and Luffy stood over Servace, glaring down at him.

"I would kill you right now," Zoro informed him flatly. "But since the cook dropped it, I will, too."

Luffy cracked his knuckles. "Come near my nakama again, and I will destroy you."

Servace only nodded weakly and flopped on the deck.

Robin, standing at the railing, now motioned to the others. "I believe that is their ship approaching."

Sure enough, a ship grew closer to them, several frantic men running around on deck.

"Hey, there's the row boat!"

"Captain and the Baron must've gotten on that ship!"

"Yeah, but I don't see them!"

"Could they have been defeated?"

"Idiot! No one can defeat Captain or the Baron!"

"Go get the other one, Usopp!" Zoro called over his shoulder. "We're gonna send them back now."

Usopp pulled himself out of the group hug and ran off to the front of the deck, reappearing moments later dragging an unconscious Danni by his ankle. He dumped him unceremoniously over the rail onto the main deck.

"Thanks, Usopp!" called Luffy. Then he grabbed the rail with both his hands and walked backward, like the band on a slingshot.

Zoro got the idea and, with Robin's help on the big guy, moved them all between Luffy's arms.

"Yosh!" yelled Luffy happily. "Gomu Gomu no…"

"Slingshot?" suggested Usopp practically.

"Return to sender?" supplied Nami.

"Reaper?" tried Robin in normal macabre fashion.

"How about "Gomu Gomu no GET THE HELL OFF OUR SHIP"!" suggested Sanji, finally released from the hug.

"Yeah, that works," agreed Luffy. And then he lifted his legs and shot forward, sending the entire group catapulting across the ocean and into the side of their ship, the _Marmalade_.

"Someone should catch that hammer before he sinks to the bottom," Robin observed coolly.

Sanji looked out to where the crew was rushing around frantically to retrieve their captain and other crewmates and rolled his eye. "Who cares? They overstayed their welcome, anyway."

"SAAANJIII!!!" Luffy rocketed up to the galley and landed next to his cook. He smiled at him happily. "Your hands are better! So now you can make me some meat!"

"Luffy…" said Nami slowly, appearing behind him with one hand raised in a fist and eyes demonically shadowed. "HE JUST MADE YOU DINNER!" And she whacked him.

"Aw, but Nami…"

"It's okay, Nami-san," said Sanji cheerfully. "I'll make us all something."

"But Sanji-kun, we just had-"

"A pretty big fight," he finished for her, motioning at the blood on deck, the injury to his leg as well as Usopp's. "Some food would probably be good for us."

"Yosh!" cried Luffy, glad to see that things were going his way on the food issue.

"Besides, Nami-san," said Sanji, looking down at his left hand and moving the fingers experimentally. "Nothing would make me happier."

She stared at him for a moment, then sighed and flung up her hands. "I don't know what I'm going to do with you guys… Okay, fine." But she was smiling.

"But then, Sanji, you have to be careful with your hands and let them get lots of rest," Chopper instructed, already looking at the wounds on Usopp. "And let me look at that leg."

"Of course, doctor."

"Asshole! You calling me "doctor" does NOT make me happy, bastard!"

Sanji laughed and patted the actually very happy Chopper's head.

"Great, now I don't have to cook anymore. Though I'm sure you're all going to miss my cooking terribly, eh? The great Captain Usopp was a wonderful cook, right?"

"Eh, no."

"Sorry, Usopp."

"We'd rather have Sanji, Long Nose-kun."

"MEAT!"

"I heard you the first time! No, Usopp, I'm back for good now." He smiled and put a hand on the younger boy's shoulder. "But you really did do a good job. Thanks."

Usopp smiled. "Well, of course I did! I'm the great Captain Usopp!"

"Glad to see your hand isn't dead forever, Cook-san. It should be, you know."

"Robin-chwan is so sweet to care about me!"

Sanji started to go into the galley to make them a late-night snack when a voice stopped him.

"Oi, dartboard!"

Sanji's vein popped in his head, and he slowly turned around. "What do _you_ want, marimo?"

Zoro was the only one still on the deck, looking up at him with raised eyebrows. "You broke your promise."

"What promise?"

"That when your hands started working again, you said you'd kick my ass first. Not like I'd let you, but still." He folded his arms. "Well?"

Sanji stared back down at him, then smirked, taking a drag of his cigarette. "A promise is a promise, shitty swordsman." And before Chopper could say another word about resting his hands or his leg or any other doctorly thing, the cook had jumped over the rail.

Zoro and Sanji fell back into the familiar rhythm of their fighting, not as hard as normal for the cook's sake, but still just as intense. The two men were happy that this was back, this brotherly activity that somehow let them know they cared about each other.

Luffy smiled and watched. His nakama were all okay now, and everything was right with the world.

**The End**

* * *

A/N: Sniff sniff… It's over!!! Waaah!!! I really hope you guys enjoyed this. Thanks to everyone who was along for the ride; those who read, favorited, alerted, and reviewed! I wish I could give you all a Sanji-shaped cookie! Thanks for making my first chapter fanfic a success!

"_Either way, my legs are all I need to kick your shitty ass back to your shitty ship."_

Obviously, I stopped worrying about cleaning up his language.

"_Poitrine!"_

"Breast meat." By the way, I'm naming his attacks based on _what_ he's attacking, mostly, rather then what he usually does during said kick. So it's not entirely accurate. Meh.

"_Joue!"_

"Cheek."

"_It was on Palm Island. Right on the beach, highly rated."_

Not actually a _One Piece_ island. Obviously; Oda's much better at naming than I am.

"_Flanchet!"_

"Stomach."

"_Collier!"_

"Neck."

"_Cotelette! Selle!" _

"Ribs" and "lower back."

_And then she hit him. "Don't scare me like that!"_

At first Nami was going to simply hug him, but I decided she should at least be somewhat mad at him for almost blowing the guys hands off and almost ruining his own and all that good stuff. So she hit him. And then she hugged him. All is as it should be.

"_Reaper?" tried Robin in normal macabre fashion._

Robin said different stuff here, including "hangman" and "flying darkness of despair." It's fun to get Robin to said random creepy things!

"_Eh, no."_

In case you didn't get it, this is Nami talking.

And now, dum de dum dum dum!!! It's time for the teaser to my next big project, entitled either "Ethereal Madness" or "Room for Two" (haven't decided which yet).

_All Sanji knew, at that moment, was that Zoro was going down, and he was the only one close enough to help. So he did what he was supposed to do; he ran toward his nakama._

_The shitty boy with the permanent grin tried to block his path, but he didn't let it deter him, simply using his face as a way to jump over the other pirates and land right next to Zoro just as the swordsman's head hit the deck._

"_Oi, marimo! You okay?" He leaned down and put a hand on Zoro's shoulder…_

_And then a green light seemed to rise from his body and engulf Sanji._

_The cook felt his whole body go strangely numb and cold and he sunk to the deck, staring blankly at the swordsman. For a moment, a blue aura rose from his body and seemed to fight with the green light; then the two mixed into a teal and sank back into Sanji's body._

_He passed out._

…

"_We got what we came here for," he complained, hefting Zoro's body. "Let's get out."_

_The other nodded. "Agreed." And then the two were gone into the night with their crew._

…

"_Sanji-kun! Sanji-kun, are you okay?"_

_What are you talking about, woman? I'm not that ero-cook, I'm Zoro!_

"_Sanji-kun! Wake up, please!"_

_I already told you, I'm not-_

"_Nami-san? What happened?"_

_What the hell was that!?! Why did I just talk like that dartboard?_

"_What the hell!?! Zoro!?!"_

"_Sanji-kun? What's wrong?"_

"_I just think I've finally cracked; I'm hearing moss-heads in my brain. Where is he, anyway?"_

"_They took him, Sanji-kun. Didn't you see it?"_

"_What do you mean, took me? I'm right here, damn woman!"_

"_S-Sanji-kun!?!"_

"_I'm not Sanji, damn it, I'm- Of course I'm Sanji, what are you- WHAT THE HELL!?!"_

**Coming soon to a computer screen near you…**

In case you didn't get it (it's kind of confusing because I was skipping stuff), Zoro's soul has _somehow_ been placed inside Sanji's body. But they didn't switch; Sanji is still very much around. Oh dear…

Sad to see the story end but thinking back on fond times during the journey, this is Dandy Wonderous, signing off.


	7. Epilogue

Hello, all, here it is! The special SaNa epilogue! I hope you enjoy it (it's my first out and out attempt at a love scene like this, so it may be a little silly).

I'm still not sure about the SanRob epilogue. For now this will say, "Complete," but I may change my mind later. For now, you SanRob fans can check out my fic "Gives You Hell" for what fluff it brings. ZoTash fans, too.

**Reader Review Corner!**

ShaolinQueen: I'm glad you enjoyed it so much! And I'm still not sure about the other one… Hmm… Oh yeah, this reminds me: I'm in the middle of writing the new story's first chapter!!! It'll be up soon, hopefully.

Dancing Nightmare: Psh. Any fight scene + "He's a Pirate"=EPIC! I'm glad you liked it so much though. Yeah, I'm a Zoro/Sanji nakamaship whore, too (though I still can't see them as a couple -_-).

Three-days-late: Nah, you're not a jerk. Glad you liked it, and hope you like this, too. Oh yeah, and you call Sanji a pimp here, Miss "I'm gonna make Sanji get with every girl in _One Piece_ (and then Zoro, too)"? Heehee, just playin' with ya (I love "A Date With Sanji," in case you didn't figure that out).

Mysterious Panther: Yep! XD Oh, and I got your (not-so-subtle) hint there. Hope you like this!

RusalkaHime: Thank you!!! And yes, it is going to be called "Room For Two," because I decided it fit the plot better.

On with the show!!!

**

* * *

**

A Chef's Hands

By Dandy Wonderous

Special Epilogue

Two days after the attack, Sanji was up extra early to start on breakfast. He had been cooking lately with a sort of obsessive fervor, as though to make up for the time he had been away from his kitchen.

He wasn't really sure why he was making bread, though. They didn't really need any, but here he was, kneading dough like a man possessed. Maybe it was because it was something that he could feel with his entire hand; could feel and know that they were really working again.

_I'll just make French toast, I guess,_ he decided.

For a long time it was quiet and still, the only disturbance being the small thump of the dough when he would flip it over. He would squeeze it unnecessarily hard, reveling in the feel of the tensing muscles. They got tired easily, so he really shouldn't be doing this. But he couldn't stop. The feeling was intoxicating, more addictive than any cigarette.

The door creaked open ever so slightly, and he tensed a little in irritation at being interrupted. It was probably Luffy hunting for a snack, and it annoyed the cook to no end that he would have to turn away from his new drug of dough kneading to get rid of him. But when the intruder entered his aggravation immediately melted into pleased surprise.

Nami stared at him, curious and slightly embarrassed. "What are you doing up this early, Sanji-kun?"

"Making bread, Nami-san!" he cooed, though somewhere in the back of his mind he realized that this might sound just a tiny bit ridiculous.

Apparently Nami didn't think so-_he_ was the cook, after all, not her, so she left all food related matters to him. "Oh."

Sanji returned to kneading his dough, the pleasure of the routine movement invading his mind again, enhanced by the company of a gorgeous woman. He would have been quite content to go on like this forever (or at least until his Nami-san required something of him), but the navigator spoke up again.

"Should you really be doing that? Chopper told you to take it easy."

"Nami-swan is so sweet to worry about me!"

"I'm not worried about you, idiot. I just want to make sure you don't ruin your hands, or we'd have to get another cook."

"Oh… O-of course, Nami-san."

She regretted her words instantly at the wounded expression that was shooed away almost the moment it appeared. He seemed to hesitate, then kept right on, working with the dough just as furiously as he had before.

"Sanji-kun?" she said gently.

"I'm sorry, Nami-san, but I just can't stop." Thump, knead, knead. "It feels so great to have my hands back… I just can't stop cooking."

Well, she couldn't begrudge him that, so she sat down at the table and stayed still, watching him.

"So, Nami-san?" he continued conversationally. Thump, knead, knead. "Why are _you_ up so early?"

"Couldn't sleep," she shrugged.

"Would you like a drink or a snack, perhaps? I'd be happy to get you anything you desire!" Thump, knead, knead.

"No thank you, Sanji-kun. I'll just… sit here for awhile."

"Yes, Nami-san, whatever you want!" _Mellorine! Nami-swan wants to spend time with _me_!_

Thump, knead, knead.

Thump, knead, knead.

Thump, knead…

_Shit, I almost forgot._ "Nami-san?"

"Hmm?"

He stopped to rub his hands clean on a dish towel and then reached into the pocket of his slacks. He pulled out a small change purse and tossed it onto the table. "That's yours."

"Huh?" Confused, she straightened up and picked up the purse. Upending it, she dumped the coins into her hand and stared at them in confusion. "Sanji-kun, what-"

"I owe you that, remember?"

Confusion turned to realization. "Sanji-kun, I already told you not to worry about the paper-"

"It's rent, Nami-san," he said patiently, smiling at her. Then he returned to his bread dough. Thump, knead, knead.

Nami was shocked that he had taken her seriously. But then again, if _anyone_ was going to take such a demand seriously, it would be him. With a slightly reluctant sigh, she dropped the coins back into the purse and got up. She walked over and put it down on the counter next to him.

He stared down at it in confusion. "But Nami-san-"

"Knock it off, Sanji-kun. You know I wasn't being serious."

He pushed it at her insistently with his elbow. "But Nami-san, I took your room. And… and you took care of me all that time. So you deserve it."

_Oh, so _that's_ what this is all about._ "Sanji-kun, don't worry about the room, okay? I would've done it for anyone. Besides, this is your cigarette money, right? Last thing I need is you being all bitchy from withdrawal."

Why was she being so harsh to him all of a sudden? She didn't get it; she didn't mean to, but she just kept saying stupid things.

He hesitated, unsure, then took the coin purse and put it back in his pocket. "If that's what you want, Nami-san."

Thump, knead, knead.

He started up again. "I just thought you deserved it, Nami-san, for taking care of me like you did."

"It wasn't just me," she pointed out. "Chopper did a lot of it, and Robin, and even Zoro… We all pitched in."

Thump, knead, knead.

"But no one else…" His cheeks tinged with pink. "Well… You know."

_Ah. _Now she got it; she had been his shoulder to cry on, and now he thought he needed to make it up to her somehow, repay her. Wasn't that just like Sanji, thinking he owed people things and always looking for some way to repay them.

Thump, knead, knead.

Thump, knead, knead.

"I didn't take care of you for money, Sanji-kun. You should know that."

"I'm sorry, Nami-san, I didn't mean to offend you!" He seemed genuinely concerned.

"You didn't, Sanji-kun, I can see how you might have thought that."

"No, Nami-san, I could never think bad about you!" He stared down at the dough. "I just thought… that you needed _something_…"

Thump, knead, knead.

"…To make up for that wasted time."

Thump, knead, kne-

He froze as her arms wrapped themselves around his waist comfortingly. "I was helping my nakama when he needed me, Sanji-kun. I don't think that was a waste of my time."

"N-nami-san?" _Mellorine, mellorine, MELLORINE!_

"So stop thinking that, idiot."

She had meant the hug to be short, just to let him know that she was there for _him_, not his money, but suddenly she realized she wasn't letting go. _That's enough, Nami,_ she told herself. _You can stop now._

But she didn't, and she couldn't really figure out why. She held him even tighter, until he twisted around in her arms and was holding her, now, too.

They stayed like that for a long time, and Nami was surprised and confused at how _right_ it all felt, how her head fit so perfectly in the little crook between his neck and his shoulder and the way his arms rested so comfortably on her back. It was something like the night she held him when he was so broken and vulnerable, except this time neither of them were broken or vulnerable, they just _were_, and it felt wonderful, shooting a thrill of adrenaline through her entire body.

And she supposed that it was that adrenaline that led her to looking up into that big blue eye, so uncertain and at the same time so happy.

The second their eyes locked he moved, cupping her face in one hand-one gentle and fully functioning hand, only a faint scar left from where the dagger pierced it-and pulling her closer. Up to his face, up to his lips.

He had to bend just a little, and then they kissed.

It started out slow, as neither of them really knew what to do. Kissing seemed to be a new area for both of them; Nami may have seduced many men into doing her bidding, but never had she kissed one, and she doubted he had had much time for the experience, either, all his flirting aside.

So first they were just touching lips, both feeling around experimentally. It didn't last long, though, as instinct began to take over. Sanji pressed down harder, then opened his mouth just enough to really taste her lower lip, and then she did the same to his upper lip. Then his tongue danced lightly on her teeth, and she played coy with it for a moment before granting it entry. Her arm circled his shoulders and she found herself gripping his shirt as though to hold him in place, or maybe herself, as she felt light-headed enough to float right off the floor. His other hand, no longer crushed and mangled, wound itself ably into her hair, lightly stroking the orange strands.

They finally pulled apart, he still planting light kisses on her lips while she gasped a little for air. With one last touch he pulled back, panting a good deal himself.

Once he had enough breath to speak, he said the only word he could in that situation. "Mellorine!"

She smiled a little and leaned back against his chest. "So, do you believe me now, Sanji-kun?"

"Yes, I most certainly do, Nami-san!" he cooed in pure elation. Then, a little more nervously, "But Nami-san, does this mean… that you love me like I love you?"

She stiffened a little, and he felt it.

"I mean, because if you don't that's fine, I mean-"

She silenced him with one finger pressed gently to his lips. "I just think _love_ is a strong word at this point," she explained. "But I do care, _really_ care about you… And apparently I also like you… in _that_ way."

He laughed a little at that. "Actually, Nami-san, I think that's the way I feel about you, too."

She squeezed him tighter. "So, we agree we are in _like_ with each other."

"Yes, Nami-san."

"Then we're officially a couple!" She grinned up at him.

"Mellorine," he whispered, and then their lips were together again.

This time when they pulled away she gave him a coy smile. "But just because you're my boyfriend doesn't mean you get any slack in your debt!"

"Of course, Nami-san! I would never expect you to lower it for me!"

"That's good, 'cuz I won't." She laughed and hugged him one last time, then she pulled back and held him at arm's length. He didn't seem to happy about the change. "You finish your bread and get back to breakfast," she ordered lightly.

"Yes, Nami-swaaan!" He whirled to do her bidding and was about to start kneading the dough again when he realized that it had long ago lost the need for that. He grinned self-consciously and got it ready for baking. "By the way, Nami-san, earlier you said I was an idiot."

"Yeah?"

"Well, I'm obviously not." He gave her a playful smile. "After all, I got the girl in the end."

She laughed and turned to leave. "By the way, Sanji-kun… that would never have been enough money to cover the rent you owe me."

Then she turned back around, yanked his face down to her level, planted one last strong kiss on him, and then exited the galley.

Sanji stared after her swinging hips before collapsing into a happy lovesick puddle on the ground.

The whole ship could hear his delighted shout. "Mellorine!!!"

**The End**

* * *

A/N: Yeah, I know; no, "I love you Sanji, omg, marry me!!!" from Nami… But you gotta walk before you run. I like them being like this first better, anyway (I actually kind of hate fics where she just suddenly realizes she loves him and says so). Even Sanji really feels that way, because of his flirtiness. Even so, they still made out, so it's still good. And think of it like this; they're starting out liking each other here, but later… Yeah.

I could have been really sexy and been like, "Come on, Sanji-kun, let's go see what _else_ those hands are good at kneading…" But I don't do lemons. Feel free to envision your own if that's what you want.

Oh, yeah, and I don't know what was up with the whole "thump, knead, knead," thing. I just used it once to show a pause in Sanji's talking, then I used it again for another pause, and suddenly it became representative of all the pauses in the conversation! Doesn't it feel special.

I'm really glad you guys liked this story, and I hope you're around for the next one!!!

This is Dandy Wonderous, excited about torturing Zoro and Sanji (mentally) in her next fic, signing off!


End file.
